jazzriff's definitions
The Church of Voodoo Pharmacology is a popular and global cult which holds the paranoid belief that all scientific studies regarding illegal drugs are liberal conspiracies and thus completely false, and that all illegal drugs are without exception Satanic, immoral, life-ruining, addictive, and deadly. The actions of this cult are oriented towards demonizing and incarcerating all illegal drug users, and in some cases removing them from the earth in some type of Holocaust (see Rush Limbaugh). They strongly and unquestionably support the war on drugs. The official term for all those who disagree with them in any way is "pro-drug."
Many organizations are involved in this cult, including the PDFA, ONDCP, DEA, UN, Republicans, and various pharmaceutical companies, as well as almost all fundie groups. The cult has no official leadership, but the US government and UN share most of the administrative duties.
The cult was founded by Harry J. Anslinger (also first head of the DEA), who was mainly responsible, through the successful use of propaganda, for the national and subsequently global criminalization of marijuana (globally criminalized through U.N. conventions). He was well-known for his racism and violent hatred of jazz, as well as his hypocrisy, reversing his position on the effects of marijuana from the claim that it would make you murderous to the claim that it would make you absolutely useless. This led some to conclude that he was hepped up on goofballs. Some enlightening quotes from him are below.
Many organizations are involved in this cult, including the PDFA, ONDCP, DEA, UN, Republicans, and various pharmaceutical companies, as well as almost all fundie groups. The cult has no official leadership, but the US government and UN share most of the administrative duties.
The cult was founded by Harry J. Anslinger (also first head of the DEA), who was mainly responsible, through the successful use of propaganda, for the national and subsequently global criminalization of marijuana (globally criminalized through U.N. conventions). He was well-known for his racism and violent hatred of jazz, as well as his hypocrisy, reversing his position on the effects of marijuana from the claim that it would make you murderous to the claim that it would make you absolutely useless. This led some to conclude that he was hepped up on goofballs. Some enlightening quotes from him are below.
"Reefer makes darkies think they're as good as white men." (1929)
"There are 100,000 total marijuana smokers in the US, and most are Negroes, Hispanics, Filipinos, and entertainers. Their Satanic music, jazz, and swing, result from marijuana use. This marijuana causes white women to seek sexual relations with Negroes, entertainers, and any others."
"...the primary reason to outlaw marijuana is its effect on the degenerate races." (taken from his testimony to Congress)
"Marijuana is an addictive drug which produces in its users insanity, criminality, and death."
"You smoke a joint and you're likely to kill your brother."
"Marihuana leads to pacifism and communist brainwashing." (1948)
The Church of Voodoo Pharmacology continues to be well known for hypocrisy, racism, and an obsession with marijuana.
"There are 100,000 total marijuana smokers in the US, and most are Negroes, Hispanics, Filipinos, and entertainers. Their Satanic music, jazz, and swing, result from marijuana use. This marijuana causes white women to seek sexual relations with Negroes, entertainers, and any others."
"...the primary reason to outlaw marijuana is its effect on the degenerate races." (taken from his testimony to Congress)
"Marijuana is an addictive drug which produces in its users insanity, criminality, and death."
"You smoke a joint and you're likely to kill your brother."
"Marihuana leads to pacifism and communist brainwashing." (1948)
The Church of Voodoo Pharmacology continues to be well known for hypocrisy, racism, and an obsession with marijuana.
by jazzriff October 12, 2005
Get the Church of Voodoo Pharmacology mug.Trolling is the act of purposefully antagonizing other people on the internet, generally on message boards. When done in a moderated internet community, this can result in banning. When done to uptight people such as fundies, this can result in hilarity.
by jazzriff October 29, 2005
Get the trolling mug."Goth" or "Gothic" refers to many things.
1) (Original meaning) The Goths were a tribe of what we would now call Germans, who, despite the Romans' constant efforts to steal their land, pwned Rome old-school back in the day; this led to the fall of the Roman empire. They were known for having beards, thus the term "barbarian" (as "barbarus" is Latin for beard). They were also known to be "uncivilized;" for example, they did not have walls, and had no significant military technology or battle strategy, yet often crushed the Romans with vicious charging attacks.
2)An angular and high-ceilinged style of architecture (known as "gothic") created during the Middle Ages which was derided as "gothic" in the sense of "barbaric" by pretentious Renaissance types who had bad taste in architecture. Most remaining gothic buildings are churches.
3)Goth is a subculture consisting of people known as "goths."
4)A Goth is a member of the above-mentioned subculture, who often (though not necessarily always) wears Goth clothing and may or may not listen to Goth music. Goths are generally atheists, often intellectual, and for the most part are not interested in mainstream music or mainstream values (such as materialism). Goth clothing is all generally black, but other than this Goth fashion varies. It generally does not include things such as t-shirts, sneakers or shorts, and can include any of the following:
-metal chains
-large black boots
-Victorian-style dresses (usually black)
-corsets
-black eye makeup
-leather
-studded or spiked belts
-various accesories involved in BDSM
-unusual hairstyles
5)Goth is a broad term for types of music, which though having no very specific definition (as practically no one calls their music "Goth music"), are generally rock which resembles metal (in both sound and instrumentation) and sometimes industrial rock (e.g. Nine Inch Nails). It tends to be dark both musically and thematically, particularly in relation to mainstream pop music. The main difference between Goth music and metal is that Goths listen to and play Goth music and metalheads listen to metal and often dislike Goths. Also, Goth music is less likely to have guitar solos and more likely to have female vocalists. Some music is however referred to as Goth metal, e.g. Lacuna Coil and Type O Negative.
Marilyn Manson's music can be referred to as Goth, but then, many people would consider that statement personally insulting. The band Evanescence is also sometimes called Goth, but many Goths also find this claim insulting due to a perceived similarity between and Evanescence and a nu-metal band called Linkin Park, whose music is complete shit.
6)"Goth" can be used as an insult by fools, much in the same way that punk is used by douches as an insult to people who openly call themselves punks.
1) (Original meaning) The Goths were a tribe of what we would now call Germans, who, despite the Romans' constant efforts to steal their land, pwned Rome old-school back in the day; this led to the fall of the Roman empire. They were known for having beards, thus the term "barbarian" (as "barbarus" is Latin for beard). They were also known to be "uncivilized;" for example, they did not have walls, and had no significant military technology or battle strategy, yet often crushed the Romans with vicious charging attacks.
2)An angular and high-ceilinged style of architecture (known as "gothic") created during the Middle Ages which was derided as "gothic" in the sense of "barbaric" by pretentious Renaissance types who had bad taste in architecture. Most remaining gothic buildings are churches.
3)Goth is a subculture consisting of people known as "goths."
4)A Goth is a member of the above-mentioned subculture, who often (though not necessarily always) wears Goth clothing and may or may not listen to Goth music. Goths are generally atheists, often intellectual, and for the most part are not interested in mainstream music or mainstream values (such as materialism). Goth clothing is all generally black, but other than this Goth fashion varies. It generally does not include things such as t-shirts, sneakers or shorts, and can include any of the following:
-metal chains
-large black boots
-Victorian-style dresses (usually black)
-corsets
-black eye makeup
-leather
-studded or spiked belts
-various accesories involved in BDSM
-unusual hairstyles
5)Goth is a broad term for types of music, which though having no very specific definition (as practically no one calls their music "Goth music"), are generally rock which resembles metal (in both sound and instrumentation) and sometimes industrial rock (e.g. Nine Inch Nails). It tends to be dark both musically and thematically, particularly in relation to mainstream pop music. The main difference between Goth music and metal is that Goths listen to and play Goth music and metalheads listen to metal and often dislike Goths. Also, Goth music is less likely to have guitar solos and more likely to have female vocalists. Some music is however referred to as Goth metal, e.g. Lacuna Coil and Type O Negative.
Marilyn Manson's music can be referred to as Goth, but then, many people would consider that statement personally insulting. The band Evanescence is also sometimes called Goth, but many Goths also find this claim insulting due to a perceived similarity between and Evanescence and a nu-metal band called Linkin Park, whose music is complete shit.
6)"Goth" can be used as an insult by fools, much in the same way that punk is used by douches as an insult to people who openly call themselves punks.
"Why would anyone love a punked-out Goth freak?" -Britney Spears, referring to Amy Lee of Evanescence
"That building is so flagrantly Gothic! Well, I never! Architecture has just gone downhill since the Romans, don't you agree, Jeeves?"
"That building is so flagrantly Gothic! Well, I never! Architecture has just gone downhill since the Romans, don't you agree, Jeeves?"
by jazzriff October 10, 2005
Get the Goth mug.A completely fictional creature invented in the 1980's by the Church of Voodoo Pharmacology. The allegation was that crack cocaine smoked by pregnant women essentially caused fetal alcohol syndrome, when in fact (as many doctors have testified), the often-freakish babies born to crack addicts were the victims of serious malnutrition (as their mothers were often very poor and/or retarded) and of course fetal alcohol syndrome.
Interviewer: Tell us about the crack baby plague which is sweeping the nation.
Doctor: Actually, on examining these "crack babies," I find that their mothers were almost always alcholics and chain-smokers who were seriously malnourished during pregnancy. Any fetus would be extremely lucky to end up normal in that situation, with or without cocaine.
Interviewer: No, you're not getting the concept. We want to know about the *plague* of *crack babies*. If you won't cooperate we'll just interview someone else.
(true story, paraphrased)
Doctor: Actually, on examining these "crack babies," I find that their mothers were almost always alcholics and chain-smokers who were seriously malnourished during pregnancy. Any fetus would be extremely lucky to end up normal in that situation, with or without cocaine.
Interviewer: No, you're not getting the concept. We want to know about the *plague* of *crack babies*. If you won't cooperate we'll just interview someone else.
(true story, paraphrased)
by jazzriff October 29, 2005
Get the crack baby mug.The ONDCP, or Office of National Drug Control Policy, is a hate group and propaganda organization similar to the PDFA, except that it is a part of the U.S. government and thus gets massive taxpayer funding. They advocate the same things as the PDFA, including the parenting tactic of spying on your kids. There is so much similarity between the PDFA and the ONDCP that there are very few people alive who can tell the difference anymore. I am not one of these people; thus anything on the PDFA page is probably true of the ONDCP as well (and not necessarily true of the PDFA, but probably). They are part of the Church of Voodoo Pharmacology, the same cult as the PDFA and DEA.
ONDCP: Calling drug users terrorists isn't working! We blame the terrorists and the liberals! Give us more money to do the same thing louder and more frequently!
U.S. government: That'll show them pro-drug types!
U.S. government: That'll show them pro-drug types!
by jazzriff October 12, 2005
Get the ONDCP mug.Technical (boring) definition: Jazz is a now-unpopular genre of music, encompassing several distinct styles, developed for the most part by black men in American cities over the course of the 20th century. Jazz in general is characterized by the following:
-improvised solos (though they can also be written out beforehand, and, especially when recorded, are often somewhat planned out)
-a rhythm section consisting of bass, drums, piano and sometimes guitar
-syncopation
-bass lines which are improvised to fit the chords, usually with one note on every downbeat, and which rarely, if ever, stop
-an uneven style of playing eighth notes so that the downbeat lasts roughly twice as long as the upbeat (this is known as "swing" eight notes)
-extended chords (7th, 9th, 11th, and 13th chords) as pioneered by 19th century composers in the classical "impressionist" movement
-4/4 time
-the common lack of vocals
-2 common song forms: the traditional 32-bar AABA song form, and the 12-bar blues form
Colloquial (less boring) definitions:
“Jazz,” originally a noun used mainly in Harlem in the beginning of the 20th century to mean “sexual intercourse,” is also used as a verb in the phrase “to jazz (something) up,” meaning to add style, individuality, soul, or passion to something.
"If haven't figured it out by now, you'll never know."
-Louis Armstrong
"The say music speaks louder than words, so I'll just let the music speak for itself."
-Charlie Parker
-improvised solos (though they can also be written out beforehand, and, especially when recorded, are often somewhat planned out)
-a rhythm section consisting of bass, drums, piano and sometimes guitar
-syncopation
-bass lines which are improvised to fit the chords, usually with one note on every downbeat, and which rarely, if ever, stop
-an uneven style of playing eighth notes so that the downbeat lasts roughly twice as long as the upbeat (this is known as "swing" eight notes)
-extended chords (7th, 9th, 11th, and 13th chords) as pioneered by 19th century composers in the classical "impressionist" movement
-4/4 time
-the common lack of vocals
-2 common song forms: the traditional 32-bar AABA song form, and the 12-bar blues form
Colloquial (less boring) definitions:
“Jazz,” originally a noun used mainly in Harlem in the beginning of the 20th century to mean “sexual intercourse,” is also used as a verb in the phrase “to jazz (something) up,” meaning to add style, individuality, soul, or passion to something.
"If haven't figured it out by now, you'll never know."
-Louis Armstrong
"The say music speaks louder than words, so I'll just let the music speak for itself."
-Charlie Parker
by jazzriff October 10, 2005
Get the jazz mug.This refers to brain damage (in the form of permanent retardation) caused by a fetus being exposed to alcohol via the alcoholism of the mother. This is not to be confused with child abuse, which can also cause retardation and brain damage and be caused by alchoholism, but which involves children, which are alive, rather than fetuses, which are not fully alive, and thus inferior. Also not to be confused with the similar concepts of "crack babies" or "meth babies," which are completely unsubstantiated (and widely denounced, by those professionals who study such things) allegations propagated by the Church of Voodoo Pharmacology.
The phrase can be used as an explanation for unusually retarded behavior. See alcohol in the blood surrogate.
The phrase can be used as an explanation for unusually retarded behavior. See alcohol in the blood surrogate.
by jazzriff October 14, 2005
Get the fetal alcohol syndrome mug.