dick doughnut

A dick doughnut is an apparatus that prevents extremely long and large penises from deep penetration during sexual intercourse. Deep penetration can cause hemorrhaging, cervical cancer, uterine ruptures and deformed children.

A dick doughnut was designed to protect the lady and to give the gentleman a "balls deep" feeling. When a man wears a dick doughnut, he is able to pound away at his partner's vagina without having to hear comments like "ouch", "too deep", and "don't thrust to far."

Dick doughnuts can be purchased at sex toy shops all over the country. Interestingly enough, an inflatable dick doughnut is available for women who are always on the go and would like to keep one in her purse at all times.

The average purchasers of dick doughnuts are usually petite women, Asian women, and young 18 year olds girls who enjoy having sex with men in their upper 30's who just so happen to have extremely long and large penises.

A new version is expected and will come equipped with a clitoral stimulator on one end with a testicular tickler on the other.
My gf told me that my dick is too long and she told me to wear a dick doughnut so I won't hurt her.
by cityguychicago July 12, 2011
Get the dick doughnut mug.

one round clown

A boyfriend who can only have sex once and then passes out shortly afterward. It could mean that he is too old, too drunk or he doesn't find you that attractive to have sex with you again.
Girl 1: Aww girl, me and my man did it ALL-NIGHT last night! He wouldn't stop. He went for five rounds!

Girl 2: You are so lucky! My man and I only did it once last night. He is a one round clown.
by cityguychicago February 17, 2010
Get the one round clown mug.

pass out pad

A rental apartment that a married man or just a man in his 30's rents just to "passout" at or to bang younger women at. Pass out pads usually have the bare essentials; including a bed and sometimes condoms. But, usually not!

The place is never clean; yet is never dirty. And it is always within walking distance of bars and clubs.

Women usually have to bring their own toilet paper if they want to spend the night there. If you don't, I suggest taking a few cocktail napkins from the bar before you leave.

If you get hungry in the morning, you can forget about breakfast. His fridge wont even be plugged in. So, just make your way to Starbucks and forget that this guy ever existed!
Guy at bar: Want to come see my pass out pad?

You; drunk at bar: Okay
by cityguychicago November 30, 2009
Get the pass out pad mug.

Boner Party!

A Boner Party is a party where guys have to maintain erections for as long as they can. If they lose their erection they lose the game. The man who can keep his erection the longest wins. The winner gets to have sex with any girl of his choosing for seventeen minutes. Guys who have lost the game and girls who do not want to have sex with the winner utilize various tactics to get the potential winners to lose their erections. Various tactics may include, but not limited to: vomiting, displaying pictures of unattractive people, and telling dead grandma jokes.
I hope I'm the winner of tonight's Boner Party! I really want to have sex with Kristen.
by cityguychicago August 14, 2017
Get the Boner Party! mug.

eyes left!

During standard military formation, when the battalion marches past the Colors, the Battalion Commander and other dignitaries, the platoon leader orders his platoon "Eyes Right!"

This command is to order the platoon to look towards the the Colors and Battalion Commander as they march past.

Along with the Battalion Commander, several dignitaries may also be present with him. These dignitaries may include heads of state, congressmen and even the President.

Since many people are disappointed with Obama, including the Armed Forces, this "inside joke" has a strong foundation. The "inside joke" is to command "Eyes Left!" so that the platoon looks away from Obama instead of towards him.

This offense is punishable in a military court, so the order will never be heard nor followed. But in secrecy, in the military bases, in the bars outside of the bases, and at the homes of fellow men, "Eyes Left" means that you are upset with the way Obama is running the country.
Military Man 1: So what do you think about Obama?

Military Man 2: Eyes Left!
by cityguychicago August 28, 2009
Get the eyes left! mug.

my purse

What a woman in the sex industry refers to her vagina as. (Pornstar, escort, stripper, etc) Her vagina is her primary body part that she makes a living from. If her purse is damaged in anyway; her income severely suffers.
Boyfriend: Do you like it when I go deep?

Girlfriend: Yeah, but not too deep

Boyfriend: Why

Girlfriend: I have to work the streets this weekend and I don't want you to hurt my purse...
by cityguychicago November 04, 2009
Get the my purse mug.

drama bait

What your girlfriend or wife creates when she has nothing better to do with her time or when she is upset with you for some unknown reason. Women use drama bait to lure you into an argument that will result in screaming, things being thrown, and crying.
You: Hey, how are you?
Girlfriend: How drunk were you last night?
You: I'm not gonna fall for your drama bait
Girlfriend: THIS ISN'T DRAMA BAIT! JUST ANSWER THE QUESTION!!!
You: Bye
by cityguychicago June 30, 2014
Get the drama bait mug.