cathi robertson's definitions

hypercritters

noun; people who say fake cuss words like troutturd instead of bassturd, ashhole instead of asshold, frog or froggin instead of fuck or fucking, somehow trying to imply that they are holier than the person who uses real cuss words. when in actuality they will burn in hell with the rest of us authentic cussers and are only fooling themselves. froggin troutturds they're all ashholes if you ass me.

I'm so sick of all the hypercritters who can't get honest about their potty mouths like the rest of us.

by Cathi Robertson August 5, 2008

sexpectations

noun; the expectations one has regarding sex.

Flo: I hear you're going out with Butch tonight, are you excited?"

Mo: Well, he's cute and everything, but I saw his penis in the bathroom yesterday and for a 6'4" gay man he's exceptionally small, so my sexpectations aren't that great."

Flo: ahhh..size doesn't matter.

Mo: *slap*

Flo: "ouch" alright alright..size matters..cheeze n rice!

by Cathi Robertson August 19, 2008

snarf

The sound your grandma (and other old people or people with deviated septums)make when they laugh. A combination of a snarl and laugh and snort. You know it when you hear it.

Grandma: omg, that's so funny, *snarf*

by Cathi Robertson June 15, 2008

ashhole

(noun) a word used as an alternative to asshole by people who think they're somehow "better" or "good" because they don't curse. (Also see: troutturd, hypercrite, frogging and bullshirt)

"You're such an ashhole!, find another ride home from church!"

by Cathi Robertson June 17, 2008

bastectomy

noun: meaning: the act of removing or having removed a bastard from your life completely.

Friend #1: Are you still drinking a 750ml of vodka each night?"

Friend #2 Nah, I'm down to 2 mojito's like a normal person."

Friend #1 Wow, how'd you manage that? AA?

Friend #2 Well honestly, I feel so much better now that I've had my bastectomy, I don't have a problem anymore..hiccup."

Also see: bastectimologist. (The person who removes the bastard from said life, often a professional or a new bastard)

by Cathi Robertson June 17, 2008

sucktacular

adj; a word used to describe a person, place or thing that sucks to such an extent that it warrants the addition of tacular. A word made from a combination of sucks and spectacular. Something or someone that is spectacularily sucking.

Mona: "Patty look at the dress my mother just bought me."

Patty: "omg, flowers and balloons? and what's with the plaid and polka dot mix?"

Mona: "I don't know, you know my mom, she loves a little vodka with her cornflakes every morning."

Patty: "Well no offense to your wino mom Mona, but that dress is sucktacular."

Mona: "Don't talk about my mom that way you dirty whore"

Patty: "ok"

by Cathi Robertson August 19, 2008

religion

VERB; pure religion, and undefiled before god is this; to visit the fatherless and the widow in their affliction and to keep oneself unspotted from the world; humble charity. This is the definition of religion found in the Bible

She practices religion by feeding the fatherless children in China every week.

by Cathi Robertson July 7, 2008