Zelda199's definitions
One of the two genders of all living things, the other being male. Females are physically indentifiable by their sexual organs which differ from a male's (well it's true I'm not being crude on purpose), a female having a vagina and breasts, the latter not being developed until puberty around the early to late teens.
A typical (I said typical!) female will have long hair and softer, more feminine features than a male, and wear more aesthetically pleasing clothing, getting away with colours such as pink or lilac which a male will more than likely get slated for wearing.
A female of any species has the job of giving birth and caring for offspring, except seahorses; the female lays the eggs, the males fertilises them and then carries the fertilised eggs until they develop into baby seahorses and are 'born'. However the 'non-politically correct' job of human females is not only to produce and care for offspring, but not work and stay at home to cook and clean and care for the house. They must also remain faithful to their husband and care for and obey him. But in the last few decades, feminists have become more prominent in society: mainly females but also males intent on getting equal rights for men and women. Sadly in doing so some (not all!) of these feminists, usually the women, have become sexist themselves and slate men at every given opportunity. But if you want to hear more about that then look up male in urban dictionary.
In truth the only differences and inequalities between males and females are the physical ones; general appearance, reproductive organs and stereotypical style. Men and women both have mood swings and hormones. They both can be violent and bad tempered. They both are capable of sleeping around. They both have the capacity to cheat on their significant other or treat them badly. They can both be immature. They both are able to be sexist, racist, prejudiced, unfair, corrupt, discriminating and every other awful thing you can think of. But they can also both be the most beautiful, intelligent, loving, caring, generous and fair people on this earth, if only they'd let go of their unjust ideas and realise: we only live once. There are no second chances. We should be celebrating life, not ending it; we should appreciate every second we are with our loved ones, not abuse them and their trust; we should be making friends with everyone possible, not making enemies with everyone they don't like the look of.
But this is not a rant, it is a definition. If you wanted that, look at the example.
A typical (I said typical!) female will have long hair and softer, more feminine features than a male, and wear more aesthetically pleasing clothing, getting away with colours such as pink or lilac which a male will more than likely get slated for wearing.
A female of any species has the job of giving birth and caring for offspring, except seahorses; the female lays the eggs, the males fertilises them and then carries the fertilised eggs until they develop into baby seahorses and are 'born'. However the 'non-politically correct' job of human females is not only to produce and care for offspring, but not work and stay at home to cook and clean and care for the house. They must also remain faithful to their husband and care for and obey him. But in the last few decades, feminists have become more prominent in society: mainly females but also males intent on getting equal rights for men and women. Sadly in doing so some (not all!) of these feminists, usually the women, have become sexist themselves and slate men at every given opportunity. But if you want to hear more about that then look up male in urban dictionary.
In truth the only differences and inequalities between males and females are the physical ones; general appearance, reproductive organs and stereotypical style. Men and women both have mood swings and hormones. They both can be violent and bad tempered. They both are capable of sleeping around. They both have the capacity to cheat on their significant other or treat them badly. They can both be immature. They both are able to be sexist, racist, prejudiced, unfair, corrupt, discriminating and every other awful thing you can think of. But they can also both be the most beautiful, intelligent, loving, caring, generous and fair people on this earth, if only they'd let go of their unjust ideas and realise: we only live once. There are no second chances. We should be celebrating life, not ending it; we should appreciate every second we are with our loved ones, not abuse them and their trust; we should be making friends with everyone possible, not making enemies with everyone they don't like the look of.
But this is not a rant, it is a definition. If you wanted that, look at the example.
1. A stereotypical female has long hair, is attractive, straight and wears make up and pretty clothing.
by Zelda199 November 25, 2006
Get the female mug.Typing shortcut for a turtle emoticon on MSN Messenger. So if you type (tu) in the box and press enter, a small picture of a turtle will appear. I think it only works on version 6 or higher though.
(On an MSN convo)
Harry: What's your fave animal?
Elaine: A turtle!
Harry: What do they look like then?
Elaine: (tu)
Harry: What's your fave animal?
Elaine: A turtle!
Harry: What do they look like then?
Elaine: (tu)
by Zelda199 March 27, 2007
Get the (tu) mug.1. A funky album by Weird Al, who specializes in parody songs.
Has such gems as Couch Potato (based on Eminem's Lose Yourself) and Bob, which is a fantastic song in which every lyric is a palindrome.
2. It could also be defined literally as a hat fashioned out of a poodle, which is a breed of curly haired dog. In this day and age the poodle would probably not be real and the hat would be a faux poodle hat.
Has such gems as Couch Potato (based on Eminem's Lose Yourself) and Bob, which is a fantastic song in which every lyric is a palindrome.
2. It could also be defined literally as a hat fashioned out of a poodle, which is a breed of curly haired dog. In this day and age the poodle would probably not be real and the hat would be a faux poodle hat.
by Zelda199 October 8, 2008
Get the poodle hat mug.An expression of shock, anger, surprise or general exclaimation. Sounds like a scream, yell or shout.
by Zelda199 October 20, 2006
Get the argh! mug.Euphemism/antoher word for laughing. Now people titter when the word titter is said because of obvious sexual innuendo.
1: *people laugh at man*
Man: Why do you titter so?
*people laugh more*
2: "The Life of Brian was on last night. We tittered a lot!"
Man: Why do you titter so?
*people laugh more*
2: "The Life of Brian was on last night. We tittered a lot!"
by Zelda199 November 17, 2006
Get the titter mug.Referred to in popular American sitcom Friends, in which in one episode Phoebe and Joey concoct an 'evil' plan to get Rachel and Ross back together by setting them both up on terrible dates in the hope that they realise how right they are for one another or something.
But anyway, once they have formed the plan Phoebe points out that this means they can do the plan laugh, which is basically an evil laugh which follows the creation of a good ol' fashioned evil plan. Usually used by villains such as Bond villains etc.
It goes a bit like this, "Muahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa"
But anyway, once they have formed the plan Phoebe points out that this means they can do the plan laugh, which is basically an evil laugh which follows the creation of a good ol' fashioned evil plan. Usually used by villains such as Bond villains etc.
It goes a bit like this, "Muahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaa"
Phoebe: Ooooooh, now we get to do the plan laugh!
Joey: How does that go?
Phoebe: Muahahahahahaaaa
Joey: Oh I get it, wohohohohohooooo...
Phoebe: It's not Santa's plan.
Joey: How does that go?
Phoebe: Muahahahahahaaaa
Joey: Oh I get it, wohohohohohooooo...
Phoebe: It's not Santa's plan.
by Zelda199 January 14, 2007
Get the plan laugh mug.1.
Another word for condom.
Make sure you get in a lifeboat before the ship sinks, hehe.
2.
The more usual definition of lifeboat is a boat usually stored on ships or deployed to rescue those in trouble at sea.
Boats stored on ships are used for passengers and crew to escape from a sinking ship, or perhaps to rescue someone who has fell in or been found in the water.
Another word for condom.
Make sure you get in a lifeboat before the ship sinks, hehe.
2.
The more usual definition of lifeboat is a boat usually stored on ships or deployed to rescue those in trouble at sea.
Boats stored on ships are used for passengers and crew to escape from a sinking ship, or perhaps to rescue someone who has fell in or been found in the water.
1.
Harold: I say old chap, do you have any lifeboats to spare? I am wooing Doris tonight!
Jack: Harry, I'll give you a lifeboat if you stop talking like that.
2.
Captain: Good lord, we're sinking! Get everyone into the lifeboats now!
First Mate: Sorry sir, we already deployed the boats to rescue Mr. Creosote...
Captain: Seven boats for one man? Are you insane?!?
First Mate: He's kind of fat...
Harold: I say old chap, do you have any lifeboats to spare? I am wooing Doris tonight!
Jack: Harry, I'll give you a lifeboat if you stop talking like that.
2.
Captain: Good lord, we're sinking! Get everyone into the lifeboats now!
First Mate: Sorry sir, we already deployed the boats to rescue Mr. Creosote...
Captain: Seven boats for one man? Are you insane?!?
First Mate: He's kind of fat...
by Zelda199 October 7, 2008
Get the lifeboat mug.