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WHISKEYMAN1234's definitions

Shit hit the fan

"When the shit hits the fan" is the vulgar and more satisfying term for a situation that suddenly gets messy. It gives you an idea of just how messy a situation by comparing it to being in a small room when a handful of loose feces are launched into the spinning fan blades.
1: When that silly old bitch pranged John's prized Mercedes in the parking lot and then tried to take off, shit really hit the fan. I though he was gonna kill her.

2: Where's our fucking money?! You better have it, or the shit is gonna hit the fan, believe you me!!

3: I lost everything back in 2008 when the shit hit the fan. Just like a lot of people.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 February 26, 2020
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Pushing poo

Old geezer: So how was your first day cleaning the bathrooms at Swallow's gay bar?

Cleaner: It was vile!! but pretty funny...... OMG those cubicles were something else!! There was cum, blood, and lube all over the tiles. Numerous rubber johnnys everywhere, some of them were coated in diarrhea. There were lube bottles, wrappers, fag butts and ashes scattered around, and all those needles I found in the bin. The place was a fuckin mess bruv. Oh, and you'll never guess who I saw.

Old geezer: Tell me..

Cleaner: Auntie Lee was there, I saw him in the cleaning room, naked and getting rimmed by some fat bloke. He was crying his eyes out whilst telling the man how much he loves him.

Old geezer: (Laughs) You'll see worse than that the longer you work there son. I know jobs are scarce nowadays but I did warn you about working in those kind of places. Just don't drop your marigolds when cleaning the toilets and if you do leave em for fuck's sake!!! Just like prison, those dirty queers just love pouncing on and pushing poo.

Cleaner: Shit!! I'll remember that.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 July 2, 2019
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Dick Blood

Just that, blood from an injured penis.
Did you hear about Randall? His foreskin tore during sex. He had to drive home with a towel on the seat so it wouldn't get stained with the neverending stream of seeping dick blood.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 November 9, 2018
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Chuff

UK Informal name for a person's/animal's anus.
Phil is religious and hates homosexuals, he beat the ever-living shit out of his own son when he found out that he takes it up the chuff.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 October 9, 2018
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The Screaming shits

I had oysters for the first time ever, I soon regretted it when I woke up with the screaming shits the morning after.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 October 9, 2018
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Bespoke

The word Bespoke came from the 1600's and meant something had "Been spoken for."

The modern use of the word bespoke means to be custom made exactly to a customers personal preference with absolutely no level of detail or expense spared.
I went to Honk Kong to buy a beautiful bespoke tailor made suit. Even with the travel and hotel costs, it was still a fraction of the cost of what it would be to have one made by a tailor on Savile Row.
by WHISKEYMAN1234 July 26, 2018
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Dapper

A word that describes someone who looks smart, stylish and/or classy.
1. My dad always looks very dapper in a sharp 3 piece suit when he goes to work, he even makes his boss look poor.

2. Wow Tony, your looking very dapper tonight. Have you got a date?
by WHISKEYMAN1234 July 25, 2018
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