Twon's definitions

ass ferocity

when a girl has an impeccable ass, and the mere sight of it is excruciatingly painful (much like looking at a solar eclipse with the naked eye)

The girl in the black stretch pants has such ass ferocity that I am now 50% blind in both eyes. The good news is that I'm now 150% fertile.

by TWON June 6, 2004

metrosexual

The most annoying buzzword that I have ever heard. Ever.

A heterosexual male that:

-is ONLY attracted to women
-give great attention to his appearance
-uses plenty of skin/hair care products
-dresses in style and enjoys shopping
-is hip to all things sophisticated
-prefers wine to beer
-is extremely name-brand conscious
-enjoys hosting parties/events
-is a romantic with an appreciation for art

I was born a metro, well over two decades before the term was popularly coined (Mark Simpson, 2002 - thanks a lot asshole). Now I can't even open a magazine without reading about metrosexuals. Growing trend my ass! Only about 10% of those claiming to be metro are truly metro. The remaining 90% are called something else...POSERS. These are the same guys that considered becoming homos when shows like Will & Grace and Queer Eye premiered. Get your own damn identity you fuckers!

When I heard John Kerry and Howard Dean claiming to be a metrosexuals, I knew it was time to change my ways.

The guiding light for all metrosexuals - David Beckham

by TWON December 23, 2004

DOD

Dick Of Death. What you give a girl that you have been wanting to nail for a long time, usually resulting in the girl lacking desire for sex for a while because you literally killed the pussy.

Dude, that blonde bombshell from the gym came home with me Saturday night and I gave her the DOD in every orifice. After I jizzed in her mouth, she just laid there like a zombie.

by TWON February 24, 2004

toolshed

When a male exudes attitude and arrogance from his carcass, but it is obviously much more of a facade than a reality after observing his appearance.

i.e. When a dude this he is the absolute shit, but is actually a big dipshit that rarely gets laid.

I cannot believe your friend Kim is enfatuated with Alan. That dude is the biggest damn toolshed I have ever seen in my life.

by TWON March 10, 2004

flying rhino

When one girl straps a dildo on her head (usually drenched with warm sperm), puts a pair of pre-creamed panties in her mouth, gets on all four, makes a sound like Dino from the Flintstones, takes off full blast and jack-rams the dildo into another girls asshole. This typically sends the girl who got nailed flying through the air. The term "girl" is interchangeable with "ass-banging homo."

As I peered through the lesbian's window, I witnessed a fat bitch perform the flying rhino on her skinny lesbian partner. I read in the paper the next day that surgery was required to remove the dildo from her ass.

by TWON March 8, 2004

road whore

the last girl at the bar you would ever stick your dick in because you know she told you that she doesn't own a car because of a previous DUI, and she had to suck fat dick and gurgle jism just to get a ride to the bar to try to fuck you.

Holy fuck dude. I got an STD from merely looking at that fucking road whore. THAT FUCKING BITCH ROAD WHORE!!!

by TWON February 20, 2004

gutter slut

a trashy redneck slut whore bitch that has a nasty, disease-filled vagina (and/or asshole) that craves fat cocks the way that a baby craves tit milk.

Dude, what the fuck were you thinking when you fucked that absolute gutter slut of a human being in the asshole?

by TWON February 18, 2004