TheAlwaysCorrect1's definitions
1. 90 minutes maximum
2. Show up on time, but no earlier than 15 minutes.
3. Dress how you usually dress. Don’t wear a suit unless you’re coming from a meeting.
4. Have cash in your wallet. Not because you need it. Just trust me.
5. If you can’t afford to have cash in your wallet, you can’t afford a girlfriend.
6. Ripped jeans don’t look good
7. Have a reason to leave after 90 minutes. Make some shit up if you need to.
8. Don’t say you like something just because she does. If you despise it, don’t pretend to play along.
9. Bring a condom. You never know.
10. Just in case, have a Backup Call
2. Show up on time, but no earlier than 15 minutes.
3. Dress how you usually dress. Don’t wear a suit unless you’re coming from a meeting.
4. Have cash in your wallet. Not because you need it. Just trust me.
5. If you can’t afford to have cash in your wallet, you can’t afford a girlfriend.
6. Ripped jeans don’t look good
7. Have a reason to leave after 90 minutes. Make some shit up if you need to.
8. Don’t say you like something just because she does. If you despise it, don’t pretend to play along.
9. Bring a condom. You never know.
10. Just in case, have a Backup Call
Idk what to do for this date.
“Man, just review the first date regulations for men, that’s what they’re there for.”
“Man, just review the first date regulations for men, that’s what they’re there for.”
by TheAlwaysCorrect1 December 18, 2021
Get the First Date Regulations for Menmug. The female pose where they keep one leg straight, slightly bend the other one, and put one hand on their hip because they think it makes them look attractive for some reason.
“Tonight was such a great night, let’s take a selfie!!”
Female: *right leg automatically locks at 135° angle and the other arm gets glued to her hip, only capable of being unlocked by a camera flash*
“? What are you doing? Why are you in the hoe pose?”
Female: I- I- I don’t know!!! It’s an autonomic response!! I can’t help it!!!!
Female: *right leg automatically locks at 135° angle and the other arm gets glued to her hip, only capable of being unlocked by a camera flash*
“? What are you doing? Why are you in the hoe pose?”
Female: I- I- I don’t know!!! It’s an autonomic response!! I can’t help it!!!!
by TheAlwaysCorrect1 January 8, 2023
Get the Hoe Posemug. “We can’t tell you the pay scale for this job because we are well aware that this position pays low across the entire country, however, we will make it $0.05 above the average of all jobs across the board so we can refer to it as competitive. That’s right, this salary is so competitive that we’re not even gonna tell you what it is. Please apply for this position of our dying company so we can contribute to your sad depressed life and assist you in wanting to put a shotgun in your mouth.”
Job title: Cashier
We offer a competitive salary! Please, please, PLEASE become part of our “team” so that our CEO can continue to wipe their ass with $100 bills while we all continue to eat nothing but pasta.
We offer a competitive salary! Please, please, PLEASE become part of our “team” so that our CEO can continue to wipe their ass with $100 bills while we all continue to eat nothing but pasta.
by TheAlwaysCorrect1 December 31, 2022
Get the Competitive salarymug. by TheAlwaysCorrect1 January 7, 2023
Get the Coloredmug. A vasectomy’s a medical procedure. One that makes you half a man. Remember when you twisted up your garden hose? Well, essentially that is the plan.
You might be wondering how it works…
(Bum bum bum bum) You make a small incision in the scrotal skin. Isolate the vas and (isolate the vas and then you) hold it in position with a towel clamp, then you snip the fibrous tissue (then you snip the fibrous tissue). Now you'll never have to wear a condom when you do it with your wife,
(...or anyone else you do it with. We promise not to tell, like that new hot chick at work. You know, the one who always has high beams under her ribbed-white cotton T-shirt, but then stares daggers at you for checking her out, and it's like, why do you wear that if you don't want attention? But you know you shouldn't think that way because of the sexual harassment meeting you all had to go to. Seriously, how lame was that? And you couldn't help but notice that the female lawyer running the seminar had a huge rack, like, ridiculously huge for someone who has to talk about that kind of stuff. Well, I guess that's the definition of the word “irony”).
Say goodbye to manhood. Say goodbye to babies. Say goodbye to kids like Meg (empty out your sack)
You might be wondering how it works…
(Bum bum bum bum) You make a small incision in the scrotal skin. Isolate the vas and (isolate the vas and then you) hold it in position with a towel clamp, then you snip the fibrous tissue (then you snip the fibrous tissue). Now you'll never have to wear a condom when you do it with your wife,
(...or anyone else you do it with. We promise not to tell, like that new hot chick at work. You know, the one who always has high beams under her ribbed-white cotton T-shirt, but then stares daggers at you for checking her out, and it's like, why do you wear that if you don't want attention? But you know you shouldn't think that way because of the sexual harassment meeting you all had to go to. Seriously, how lame was that? And you couldn't help but notice that the female lawyer running the seminar had a huge rack, like, ridiculously huge for someone who has to talk about that kind of stuff. Well, I guess that's the definition of the word “irony”).
Say goodbye to manhood. Say goodbye to babies. Say goodbye to kids like Meg (empty out your sack)
by TheAlwaysCorrect1 January 8, 2023
Get the Vasectomymug. by TheAlwaysCorrect1 January 29, 2023
Get the Ocular Rectal Fistulamug. A hand towel (20”x40”) is folded in half lengthwise (to become 10”x40”) and placed on a flat surface. A latex glove is then placed on the towel, perpendicular to the long end, slightly extending ~1” past the end. The towel is then rolled up completely around the glove. The extending 1” of the glove is then peeled back around the rolled up towel and secured with elastics to secure in place. Lube is then added to the interior of the glove and then spend 10 minutes deciding which porn flick to yank off too.
What’s this thing beside your bed?
Mom, that’s my Forever Alone Satisfier.
…your what?
Just look it up on Urban Dictionary and then leave please. Ima use it
Mom, that’s my Forever Alone Satisfier.
…your what?
Just look it up on Urban Dictionary and then leave please. Ima use it
by TheAlwaysCorrect1 December 18, 2021
Get the Forever Alone Satisfiermug.