Yet another colorful coloquialism for taking a dump: "Beaming" for the act of evacuation, "Schatner" as in the past tense of To shit (shat), and "off the Enterprise" denoting out of the anus (as in "the prize to be entered").

Not to be confused with Beaming Dr. Bones onto the Enterprise; the act of anal sex.
Man! Your mom's cooking is so bad it had me beaming Schatner off the Enterprise all night!
by Tenacious Faulker August 26, 2008
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panic boner

Getting a sudden and uncontrollable boner from a sudden shock of fear. Usually happens when one freaks out during a public speaking .
According to Wikipedia, actor Thomas Lennon sufffers from panic boners. Apparently he's more nervous in front of crowds than he let's on.
by Tenacious Faulker March 26, 2015
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bacon strips

Condition identifiable by stretched, grizzled, dangling, and sometimes elongated flaps of skin that used to be the labia minor on an overworked porn star's (or college co-ed's) vagina.

Not to be misdiagnosed as vaganus.
Did you see the latest Jenna Jamison flick?
No, my doctor said I need to cut back on my daily consumption of bacon strips.
by Tenacious Faulker July 11, 2007
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The be born poor; the opposite of being born with a silver spoon in your mouth.
I'm not poor and dumb enough to be a NASCAR driver, Kenny! I wasn't born with a plastic spoon in my mouth like you!

-- Eric Cartman
by Tenacious Faulker March 17, 2011
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Anything or anyone that's a HUGE pain in the ass.

To suck and blow simultaneously.
This weekend my boss is making redo this month's TPS report. What a huge three finger protological exam that's going to be!

Having Jerry around is like having a constant three finger proctological exam!

by Tenacious Faulker April 15, 2009
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ambulance drafting

Directly following an ambulance to or from an emergency in order to take advantage of the parted traffic in order to get ahead of your fellow commuters. Sometimes called ambulance chasing.
Man! Rush hour would've made me late for my job interiew, but fortunately there was a terrible accident. However, thanks to my ambulance drafting skills I was actually early. Too bad family of 5 had to die so I could land a job.
by Tenacious Faulker January 18, 2009
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keep it on the up

1) Doing what society expects of you; being a proper ciizen; acting properly. Using socially acceptable behavior. Another way to say "walk the straight and narrow path"; being a "proper"citizen; straight laced.

2) The alternate name for "Troublemaker", by Weezer, by dumbasses because they only really listen to the chorus.
"Troublemaker" Exerpt, 2nd verse:

I'm growin' out my hair,

I'm movin' up to Cherokee,

I'm gonna be a rockstar,

And you will go ta bed with me,

'Cause I can't work a job,

Like any other slob,

Punchin' in and punchin' out
and suckin-up to "Bob".

Marryin' a bi-otch,

Havin' seven ki-ods,

Givin' up and growin' old,

And hopin' there's a God.

I'm a troublemaker,

Never been a faker.

Doin' things my own way

And never givin' up

I'm a troublemaker,

Not a doubletaker.

I don't have the patience to keep it on the up.
by Tenacious Faulker June 25, 2009
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