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Telephony's definitions

lite

How a faggot would spell the word, "light".
{Seen on a C=64 demo by Abyss in 1988}

A ? TO EVERYONE: ONLY A FAGGOT WOULD REPLACE "GHT" WITH "TE". .. EX. LIGHT AND LITE. NIGHT AND NITE. WHAT IS YOUR GUY'S GAY INCEST WITH THE "TE" COMBO?
by Telephony January 12, 2017
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synthetic pan flute

The sound of a pan flute being played, but generated solely by synthesizer hardware or computer software synthesis.

No real pan flutes are folded, spindled, or mutilated when synthetic pan flutes are employed.
Hey Dan, you've got to download the Commodore Amiga demo, "Hardwired" by the Amiga demo groups Crionics and the Silents! Its zax has a synthetic pan flute you've just GOT to hear!!!
by Telephony January 7, 2017
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softoff

The complete polar opposite of a hardon -- that is, when you're fucking somebody (female OR male) when your dick goes flaccid (limp) while you're still inside them.
I was cornholing this really hot dude last night, and I suddenly got a raging softoff. How fucking embarrasing!!!
by Telephony January 4, 2017
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Twenty Stick-Busted-Stick

Simply put, the year 2017.
Called Twenty Stick-Busted-Stick because when viewed from above, it looks like a twenty, a stick, and a broken stick.
{On a BBS about wheelchairs and scooters}:

New Year's Day (0-01-17) {or "2017 01 Jan.", or even "Jan. 01, Twenty Stick-Busted-Stick if you prefer}. Just making my daily check-in from Juneau AK. USA...my people (who live in Nicaragua) we have but one bunghole...er...uh...I mean, "I only have a sodding singular update to my website today: it is an update to my Foto(s) del Día" web page with...well, what else could it be?
by Telephony December 31, 2016
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piddle you!

Similar to pee you! but with a bit less of a stench. Enough to make you wrinkle your nose a little in disgust, but not nearly as much as piss you! would require.
Piddle you! This yogurt must have gone off a few days ago. Better shitcan it before somebody gets sick from it and ralfs all over our brand new carpet!
by Telephony December 18, 2016
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piddled-off

When a TV program (such as the news or other current events program) forces heavy censorship, they urge the reporters, narrators, and other crew to say something like piddled-off instead of pissed-off.
{Narrator}:
"In this video, you'll see what happens when one piddled-off idiot takes things way too far."
by Telephony December 16, 2016
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Febreze Cannon

When you're playing the video game Digimon Racing on your Nintendo Game Boy Advance, one of your weapons is the Debris Cannon -- but it really does sound like Febreze Cannon when your digimon driver shouts it out!
I was playing Digimon Racing the other day, and l heard one of my digimon shout, "Febreze Cannon!", so I went and got a can of Febreze Air Effects and studied it to see if I could launch the little fucker at slow cars in my lane and see them douched out in my rear view mirror.
by Telephony December 12, 2016
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