25 definitions by Stivchik
croucher
The somewhat inconvenient convenience encountered in developing countries (and tragically, still in some developed ones too): a toilet where there is not much more than a hole in the floor framed by a metal or ceramic slab.
Therefore, for westerners, if one finds oneself in need of a number 2 then some important decisions need to be made regarding lower thigh strength, flexibility, clothing removal logistics and just necessity.
The somewhat inconvenient convenience encountered in developing countries (and tragically, still in some developed ones too): a toilet where there is not much more than a hole in the floor framed by a metal or ceramic slab.
Therefore, for westerners, if one finds oneself in need of a number 2 then some important decisions need to be made regarding lower thigh strength, flexibility, clothing removal logistics and just necessity.
“I wanted to use the toilets at that last service station but they only had crouchers so I decided to hold it in until we get home.”
by Stivchik February 21, 2018
A single-celled organism which communicates with the outside world almost exclusively using Instagram to seek attention from strangers by posting heavily colour-corrected pictures of itself and it’s mundane, unfulfilled existence.
Instagramoebas mostly find it difficult to communicate under any other social conditions and seem to spend roughly 50% of their time staring into their phone.
Instagramoebas mostly find it difficult to communicate under any other social conditions and seem to spend roughly 50% of their time staring into their phone.
- I can’t figure out if Anna was being rude or she’s just shy but she always seems more interested in her phone than talking to anyone for more than about 30 seconds.
- She’s turning into a bit of an Instagramoeba, it’s true.
- She’s turning into a bit of an Instagramoeba, it’s true.
by Stivchik October 17, 2018
That slightly sour, uncomfortable feeling in the bottom corners of your mouth after you‘ve gorged on things like salami, olives, red wine and cheeses and your gums aren’t used to being bombarded with so many rich, salty flavours - so it takes a while for the funny tingling in your jaw to go away.
Hey, why are you pulling those funny faces, what’s the matter with you?
Oh man, I hit the canopes in the other room hard when I got here, I was starving. Delicious - but now I’ve got the mouth gout.
Oh man, I hit the canopes in the other room hard when I got here, I was starving. Delicious - but now I’ve got the mouth gout.
by Stivchik December 7, 2018
The semi-conscious state of being of that endless stream of people dazzled by shiny, brightly coloured promises purring from the shop fronts.
- I can't believe that couple just walked into us like that. Why weren't they looking where they were going?
- It's ok, she was just in a Mall Coma.
- It's ok, she was just in a Mall Coma.
by Stivchik July 25, 2020
The position assumed by passengers of an aircraft in danger of an imminent collision or emergency landing as announced over the cabin’s public announcement system - occasionally adopted during a particularly disquieting visit to the toilet to dispatch a no.2 when someone is required to bow their head and grip something nearby or put one or both hands up against the wall.
Oh man, that curry really carved my guts up, last night. I had to assume the brace position just now.
by Stivchik May 25, 2018
Moscow Starfish
When you fall asleep drunk on a bed, sofa or floor with your arms splayed out in the shape of a star - with your clothes still on – and you wake up or are awoken the next morning in exactly the same pose.
The Moscow Starfish can be executed on one’s back as well as face down.
When you fall asleep drunk on a bed, sofa or floor with your arms splayed out in the shape of a star - with your clothes still on – and you wake up or are awoken the next morning in exactly the same pose.
The Moscow Starfish can be executed on one’s back as well as face down.
- Where’s Mark? He seemed pretty hammered last night.
- I looked into his room earlier, he’s still in a Moscow Starfish, exactly how I left him.
- I looked into his room earlier, he’s still in a Moscow Starfish, exactly how I left him.
by Stivchik June 26, 2020
Acronym for
Negative, Toxic or Sensationalist.
Pertaining to the nature and bias of the content or posts we consume on a daily basis via the Big Tech platforms and traditional media.
Negative, Toxic or Sensationalist.
Pertaining to the nature and bias of the content or posts we consume on a daily basis via the Big Tech platforms and traditional media.
by Stivchik January 19, 2021