Rev. Johnny Blumpkin's definitions

Holey Tingle

The sensation one feels after taking an unbelievably massive shit. You will notice that your anus is exhausted and you experience pins and needles sensations like when your foot falls asleep. A side effect of the Holey Tingle is a tendency to not want to sit down but also need a nap.

Guy 1: Dude, I just crapped off about 5 pounds and now my asshole is throbbing, but like, in a good way.

Guy 2: That my friend, is what we call the "Holey Tingle"

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin December 5, 2023

GFYOF

An acronym for "Go Fuck Your Own Face".

My boss: You know you're 2 minutes late right?

Me: It's snowing and the roads were a mess
My Boss: I don't care that's not an excuse
Me: GFYOF

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin May 5, 2018

Swamp Dust

The flakes of skin that line your underwear after a long day of scratching your sweaty ballbag.

I was loading the washing machine this morning and sneezed from all the swamp dust flying off my dirty boxers.

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin August 29, 2019

queef stroganoff

The thick, noxious sludge that drips from a fat woman's cooter when she gets super horned up during the summer months, and her vaginal secretions meet the rest of her panty sweat.

Oh my god, my mom went for a walk today and when she came home, the entire house stunk like Queef Stroganoff.

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin July 19, 2016

shitty yamaguchi

The act of having 2 other people defecate in a shower stall, and then stepping on each turd and sliding around like a figure skater. Popularized by Hinder guitarist Joe "blower" Garvey, as told to the world by Staind vocalist Aaron Lewis.

What do you get when you combine poop, a shower and figure skating? Shitty Yamaguchi.

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin February 20, 2019

Strawberry Shortcake

The act of ejaculating inside a woman's vagina while she is menstruating, sucking out the mixture of semen and menses whilst eating her out, then finally, passing the concoction into her mouth during kissing. It is a three part process that involves period sex, felching and snow-balling.

This new girl I am dating is a total freak, she's on the rag and asked for a Strawberry Shortcake. So I busted a nut in her bloody pussy, slurped that shit out while munching her box then spit that shit in her mouth.

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin September 27, 2023

bird box challenge

The act of imitating the movie Bird Box, and challenging yourself to complete an otherwise innocuous or petty task while blindfolded.

Guy 1: you wanna try the Bird Box Challenge?
Guy 2: Sure, what do I have to do?
Guy 1: Put on this blindfold and try to cross the street without looking.
Guy 2: Sounds kinda dangerous.
Guy 1: You never know when you'll need this skill man. Everyone's doing it!
Guy 2: Ok... **(puts on blindfold and starts walking across the street, then gets hit by a bus)**
Guy 1: Beautiful.

by Rev. Johnny Blumpkin January 2, 2019