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Definitions by QuacksO

watching the bottom line

Carefully monitoring the "level" of your pants' waistband so as not to reveal your "plumber's crack' when working in public.
"Watching the bottom line" can also refer to a bystander's lengthy observation of someone who is unknowingly "mooning the world" while engrossed in the task he's performing. Sometimes you can gain a bit of extra folding-money if you make a bet with anyone else who's with you about how long it'll be before the clueless butt-exposer either realizes his faux pas or someone else yells at him to pull his pants up.

gerrymandarin'

The sneaky re-drawin' of property/municipality-lines to benefit Asian-related interests, either a sub-group of the human race or citrus-farms.
I hear dat gerrymandarin' is a huge problem in da world's major small-and-pumpkin-shaped-citrus-growing regions, what with da huge profit-greedy mega-farm conglomerates wantin' to hog all da good crop-land real-estate.
gerrymandarin' by QuacksO June 20, 2019

hedgeucator 

A wimpy-a** teacher who just dutifully/mindlessly spouts the "standard" useless typical-b**ls**t "knowledge" that merely fills students' heads with falsehoods and pointless information, yet who also always "skirts the issue" or "ducks the question" whenever any skeptical/independent-minded classmate "poses the tough questions" regarding either the validity/truthfulness of the subject-matter ("How can you say that Odysseus was such a great and admirable hero if he shared a bed with other women and couldn't even keep his braggartly mouth shut to the Cyclops when he and his men were making their escape from him?") or the necessity of having to study a certain topics (i.e., "Why do we need to know the history of Ethiopia or learn about the founding of San Francisco? How will that knowledge help us in our future lives or aid us in finding/performing employment?").
Napoleon Blownapart famously grumbled, "History is a set of lies agreed upon." Perhaps he'd had hedgeucators in mind when he said it.
hedgeucator by QuacksO June 19, 2019
1. Where you spend money to get out of a cranky situation.
2. Where you use logic and/or creativity to get around having to purchase something.
Not everyone can afford to just "buypass" an unfortunate debacle; less-affluent folks may need to put their brains to work to figure out ways to buypass the actual/potential pitfalls --- i.e., get out of the situation "for free".
buypass by QuacksO June 19, 2019

hypoxicrite 

Someone whose blood-oxygen levels are dangerously low due to all of his hollering, wheezing, snorting, and otherwise hyperventilating at others about their supposed faults/shortcomings, when he himself either does the very same (or far worse) things.
Gerald Strickland was a prime example of a hypoxicrite --- he loudly reprimanded anyone who either drank or didn't perform up to his standards ("Slacker!"), yet he himself was a closet-alcoholic and didn't even take proper steps to ensure the safety of the students under his supervision.
hypoxicrite by QuacksO June 15, 2019

O'Reilly orgasm 

What the singers on the auto-parts-store ad sound like they're having.
I loved hearing the "Oh! Oh! Oh!" auto-parts ads on TV... sounded like a pretty good deal to me! So I went to the nearest store and eagerly asked the female staffmembers if they wanted to share an O'Reilly orgasm with me, but all I received was assorted shocked indignation, and then I got kicked out of the store under threat of sexual-harassment charges... I don't get it... what gives???
O'Reilly orgasm by QuacksO June 15, 2019

playtonic 

The "how it is in reality" spelling which describes the bulk of supposedly-just-first-base relationships between two people --- i.e., they actually "fool around" and "have fun" a-plenty, even if they'll never admit it.
Two often-reliable ways to determine what type of relationship dat a guy and girl are having --- i.e., platonic or "playtonic" --- are (1) if da girl's boobs get noticeably bigger over time, since this would indicate dat da dude has been playing wif dem a lot, or (2) if she gets pregnant (duh!).
playtonic by QuacksO June 13, 2019