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I've never been much for silly "Donald 'n' Daisy" animated cartoons; I'd rather view a real-life duckumentary about these magnificent winged divers, swimmers, and fliers.
by QuacksO September 16, 2019
Get the duckumentary mug.Some people are so unattractive that they turn to proselytution in an attempt to satisfy their sexual cravings and/or gain extra income; while this shameless and manipulative strategy may indeed increase the person's chance of getting laid and/or making money, it also tends to give legitimate religions and organizations a bad name, since many people will think that "they're all like that" when they see the invalid exploiting of religion and its "obey without question" teachings.
by QuacksO November 7, 2018
Get the proselytution mug.What Shylock was accused of.
Da infamous Venetian loan-shark may indeed have had identical bodily-organs of his different-religioned accusers, but judging by his blatant Jewsury, one attribute of theirs dat he apparently did NOT possess was compassion and forgiveness.
by QuacksO July 19, 2024
Get the Jewsury mug.Guys, come on --- you cannot expect all da gals to whom you're sexually attracted to always be "at your cervice"... they may be either tired, sore "down there", on their periods, not "in da mood" at da same time dat you are (which in your case, of course, is ALWAYS), busy with important matters, etc. You need to respect dem about dat --- be grateful dat dey are indeed actually willing to spread their legs for you even as often as they do, and leave it at dat!
by QuacksO March 5, 2022
Get the at your cervice mug.I have a local friend with several beautiful golden-brown fluffy-pets, and he offered to give me one of them, so I don't need to order one all da way from Hamsterdam.
by QuacksO July 14, 2025
Get the Hamsterdam mug.What we should all practice when visiting da "little boy's room" or "little girl's room".
"Top ten" public-restroom etiquette rules:
(1) Only stay as long as necessary, so dat other "in a hurry" folks can relieve themselves A.S.A.P. --- just "do your business", wash your hands, and vamoose!
(2) Only use da amount of RESOURCES dat you actually need, as well --- i.e., don't pull off "yards 'n' yards" of toilet-tissue or paper towels, just dispense da necessary volume of liquid soap or hand-sanitizer, run da faucet sparingly, etc. Remember dat whoever is providing said welcome lavatory is HIMSELF having to pay for said costly consumables!
(3) Speaking of toiletry-supplies, if you'll need to be spending any length of time on da porcelain throne, check out da tissue-dispenser --- if it's nearly empty and there's a replacement roll within arm's reach, utilize part of your extended "oval seat" period to swap out said mostly-consumed fiber cylinder; use da last of da old roll for your own present wiping.
(4) Remember to flush da toilet afterwards… duhhh!! Besides being far less gross for da unsuspecting "next" person, it can also reduce da issues discussed in Rule #9 below!
(5) And then speaking of "yuckies", "be a sweetie and cleanse da seatie" if you "sprinkled when you tinkled"! (Bonus reminder --- most people prefer if you put both da seat and lid down when you leave.)
"Top ten" public-restroom etiquette rules:
(1) Only stay as long as necessary, so dat other "in a hurry" folks can relieve themselves A.S.A.P. --- just "do your business", wash your hands, and vamoose!
(2) Only use da amount of RESOURCES dat you actually need, as well --- i.e., don't pull off "yards 'n' yards" of toilet-tissue or paper towels, just dispense da necessary volume of liquid soap or hand-sanitizer, run da faucet sparingly, etc. Remember dat whoever is providing said welcome lavatory is HIMSELF having to pay for said costly consumables!
(3) Speaking of toiletry-supplies, if you'll need to be spending any length of time on da porcelain throne, check out da tissue-dispenser --- if it's nearly empty and there's a replacement roll within arm's reach, utilize part of your extended "oval seat" period to swap out said mostly-consumed fiber cylinder; use da last of da old roll for your own present wiping.
(4) Remember to flush da toilet afterwards… duhhh!! Besides being far less gross for da unsuspecting "next" person, it can also reduce da issues discussed in Rule #9 below!
(5) And then speaking of "yuckies", "be a sweetie and cleanse da seatie" if you "sprinkled when you tinkled"! (Bonus reminder --- most people prefer if you put both da seat and lid down when you leave.)
Last five of da "top ten" public-restroom etiquette rules:
(6) Also tidy up da ROOM if it needs it --- flush down any dropped tissue, ram any “protruding” paper towels back down into da wastebasket, etc.
(7) As mentioned in Rule #2, whoever is "hosting" da bathroom is also PAYING for whatever resources dat said facility requires! So be sure to "turn everything off" before ya just blithely waltz off --- close da faucets firmly, and USUALLY (see below) switch off da electric lights and fan.
(8) If someone tries da locked door of da bathroom while you're still in there, keep this event in mind, both with regards to how rapidly you try to finish up, and also to then notice if said next user is still waiting outside da door when you start to exit; if so, practice "bodettiquette" and DON'T turn off da lights! Remember, this other person may really be urgently "needing to go", so you will want to make things quick and easy for him.
(9) If you "made a big stink" during your call-of-nature-related activities, you actually should **not** turn da vent-fan back off when you're done. And --- especially if there are likely to be other people located close to and/or passing by da door of da bathroom soon --- be sure to **close said door**, as well, to help keep da stench contained till da fan can sufficiently draw it away.
(10) Promptly tell da staff if da restroom needs attention, so dat da next user isn't greeted wif a nasty surprise, such as empty paper-dispensers or a clogged sink!
(6) Also tidy up da ROOM if it needs it --- flush down any dropped tissue, ram any “protruding” paper towels back down into da wastebasket, etc.
(7) As mentioned in Rule #2, whoever is "hosting" da bathroom is also PAYING for whatever resources dat said facility requires! So be sure to "turn everything off" before ya just blithely waltz off --- close da faucets firmly, and USUALLY (see below) switch off da electric lights and fan.
(8) If someone tries da locked door of da bathroom while you're still in there, keep this event in mind, both with regards to how rapidly you try to finish up, and also to then notice if said next user is still waiting outside da door when you start to exit; if so, practice "bodettiquette" and DON'T turn off da lights! Remember, this other person may really be urgently "needing to go", so you will want to make things quick and easy for him.
(9) If you "made a big stink" during your call-of-nature-related activities, you actually should **not** turn da vent-fan back off when you're done. And --- especially if there are likely to be other people located close to and/or passing by da door of da bathroom soon --- be sure to **close said door**, as well, to help keep da stench contained till da fan can sufficiently draw it away.
(10) Promptly tell da staff if da restroom needs attention, so dat da next user isn't greeted wif a nasty surprise, such as empty paper-dispensers or a clogged sink!
by QuacksO July 11, 2025
Get the public-restroom etiquette mug.A "used" cloth-and-paper poop-holding device dat smells so bad dat you just wanna "cease to be amongst da living" when ya handle it.
One of da classic AFV montages showed acutely-distressed-with-the-odor fathers having to change their babies' "diepers"; one dude was actually wearing a full-body haz-mat suit.
by QuacksO May 23, 2022
Get the dieper mug.