QuacksO's definitions

critical Mass

A supposedly "deciding" Sunday service that someone of Catholic faith feels that he must attend prior to death if he still wants to avoid going to Hell.

This whole "deathbed confession and reformation" bu**s**t just sounds like another example of "critical Mass" to me --- it sounds waaaaayyyy too "easy" or "convenient" a way to be evil and selfish all your life. How can things truly be "made whole again" if you've seriously mistreated others for many years, and then suddenly atone for it "at the last minute"?? There are still all of those other people whom you've hurt (and have had their lives ruined by your meanness) to think about --- why don't you make said "born-aginner" beliefs truly count by arranging for the restorations of those other people's losses, rather than just symbolically "making your peace with God" but still ignoring all the damage you've done over the past decades?!

by QuacksO March 18, 2019

riding shotgun

Having cowboy/cowgirl sex with a girl whose "paw" would likely make you marry her at da barrel of a thirty-aught-six side-by-side if he found out.

Hey, if you wanna risk having a roll in da hay with a hot-bodied farmer's daughter, knock yourself out, but just bear in mind dat you might likely be "riding shotgun", especially if you get said lovely damsel preggo --- remember, da cuter/sweeter da angelic-faced girl is, da more fiercely-protective her "paw" is likely to be.

by QuacksO February 21, 2023

testimoany

Exaggerated /overly-dramatic court-statements given by one or more somewhat-less-than-honest "witnesses", and which they heavily embellish with lots of whiny wheezes and crocodile-tears-drenched sighs.

Unfortunately, this strategy can actually be surprisingly effective in convincing a judge/jury of a defendant's guilt, especially if the "witness" is female --- last I heard, there are untold multitudes of totally-innocent men in prison right now --- some even on death row --- who are there merely because of the lying testimoany of some attention-seeking/money-hungry b***h and a few of her equally-conscience-impaired hussy-cronies!

by QuacksO December 25, 2018

decadeence

Da gradual decline of moral or cultural values over da course of ten-year periods.

As technology progresses, we progressively see a steady decadeence in da basic decency and caring for each other dat we'd had ten years earlier.

by QuacksO February 17, 2020

pluscebo

Something dat makes you think you're getting additional when you actually aren't.

If a chick appears to have a satisfying-full bosom under her blouse, it's wise to check to see if it's merely a pluscebo --- i.e., she might merely be wearing a padded bra.

by QuacksO August 6, 2024

Murphy's Law Of Buying In Bulk

"You can keep purchasing small costlier-per-piece packages of a product till Doomsday, and you will always continue needing a sizable amount/quantity of it per week/month/year. But then just as soon as you plunk down a tidy sum for an economy-priced bulk-quantity of said commodity, your needs and/or lifestyle will immediately change, and so now you will likely never even begin to consume that much volume in your entire lifetime."

For example, you purchase several cases of plain white paraffin candles for your antique chandelier that you love to illuminate every evening, only to then discover that an electric-candle "upgrade" kit is available, and comes with fixtures that look just like the elegant candles and fit perfectly into your chandelier's holders! So now you're stuck with many hundreds of little white-wax tapers that you'll probably never have any use for.

I feel like such a total bulk-buying buffoon --- I had been consuming several expensive plywood-cutting circular-saw blades per year in my household woodworking-tasks, and so eventually I had purchased a bargain-priced fifty-pack of only-minutely-rusty "new old stock" Skilsaw-blades from a private seller on E-Bay. But then I had started using a larger-bladed table-saw for most of my panel-slicing/trimming needs, and so I've only used one or two of the circular-saw blades from the package in the many months since that time! Sounds like a classic case of "Murphy's Law Of Buying In Bulk" to me!!!

by QuacksO August 8, 2018

Dewey Decibel System

A calibrated scale of sound-pressure-level used to measure the degree of ambient noise inside a library. Named after the infamous Thomas E. Dewey and his thunderously-cacophonous presidential campaign against Harry Truman.

The noise-level that's acceptable for inside a library is no more than 35dB on the Dewey Decibel System .

by QuacksO February 24, 2017