Definitions by QuacksO

empty-boxcars train of assurers 

Derisive term for a sizable number of acquaintances of someone with a dubious reputation who make praising statements about the individual's character/morals, offer to co-sign a loan he's requesting, etc., but who are of comparably-questionable integrity themselves, are also broke, etc., and so their own word and/or reliability is viewed as not being much more of a legitimate guarantee than the promises of the person they're vouching for. In other words, "quantito, but not qualito"... lots of impressive-looking "containers", but with no actual/tangible/legitimate "goods" inside of said containers.

Loan officer: I always feel really wary/suspicious whenever someone of unknown/questionable reputation asks for a loan and offers to bring in a number of other folks to vouch for his character, reliability, and financial responsibility --- "methinks he doth protest too much", plus usually his so-called "witnesses" appear to merely be an "empty-boxcars train of assurers"... they seem no more trustworthy than I would view the loan-requester himself as being, and so their voluminous praise/recommendations hold little significance and inspire little confidence in me regarding whether the loan-requester would actually possess adequate means/motivation/dedication to repay the money. I feel something like how the lady-attorney in "Losing Isaiah" did when she pointed out that the members of the "support group" whom ex-druggie/shoplifter Khaila had named as the people who were assisting her in her efforts to "go straight" and "live clean" had themselves all been former drug-users and/or criminals, and so she felt that they should not be considered to be viable/reliable helpers to prevent Khaila from relapsing.

empty-boxcars train of assurers by QuacksO September 21, 2018

virtuous-action subterfuge 

Refers to a seemingly-beneficial/praiseworthy action that you perform in order to cover up a past/present transgression.

Three classic examples of a virtuous-action subterfuge would be:
(1) Pretending to be cleaning up litter along a roadside, in a park, or in some other public area, and then disposing of your bags of collected trash in a nearby dumpster; in reality, of course, you merely picked up just a very few pieces of discarded trash during periods when others were looking --- the bags of trash you're carrying are mostly YOUR OWN household garbage that you're disposing of for free in someone else's dumpster, rather than paying for your own trash-disposal.
(2) Pretending to be helpfully delivering bags of groceries to a tenant of a "wrinkle city" apartment-complex; as in Example #1, however, those bulging shopping-bags are merely still-new-looking shopping-sacks that you've carefully saved from previous grocery-shopping trips and then filled with your own trash; your confederate apartment-tenant later quietly disposes of said bags in the complex's waste-bin along with his own garbage.
(3) Pretending to be cleaning/dusting a certain area of a room, whereas in reality you are covering up the fact that you either have meddled with something you weren't supposed to touch, or currently wish to do so. By cleaning the entire area that the “off-limits” object is occupying, it would seem natural for you to move/handle the object itself in the course of your cleaning, and so no observers will think twice about your harmlessly displacing the item "just to clean around/underneath it".

virtuous-action subterfuge by QuacksO September 21, 2018

Book of Philippines

A biblical chapter recounting an early history of a group of islands in the southeast-Asian area of the Pacific.

I don't know why the Book of Philippines is even included in the Bible, since most events recounted there took place in the Middle East and Africa, not in southeastern Asia.

Book of Philippines by QuacksO September 21, 2018

sinogogue 

A chapel where errant Jewish parishioners go to confess their transgressions.

If Hitler was so mad at the behavior of the Jews in his country, he could have simply set up some sinogogues to counsel and convert them; he didn't need to mass-murder them in the process.

sinogogue by QuacksO September 21, 2018

disagreeable-task swap 

Refers to a "buddy assistance" deal where Person A completes a yucky/difficult/boring job for Person B that he doesn't feel up to suffering through, while Person B tackles a similarly-sucky task that Person A would ordinarily have to perform himself, but also loathes the thought of doing.

I cleaned out Tiffany's garage in exchange for her vacuuming and mopping the muddy floors of my house after a boisterous post-game visit from our town's little-league baseball team... pretty fair disagreeable-task swap, if you ask me.

disagreeable-task swap by QuacksO September 20, 2018

Houdini Hancock 

Refers to where you sign your name to a document with disappearing ink, either because you don't want to actually be held to whatever contract/agreement that you've scribbled your signature on, or you fear that the person who's asking you to sign said document is merely trying to take advantage of you or trap you into something unreasonable/illegal, and so you're just trying to protect yourself from getting dragged into something you shouldn't be involved with.

I always insist that a contract-singer use a pen that I supply him with, so that I don't hafta worry about any Houdini Hancocks.

Houdini Hancock by QuacksO September 20, 2018

ceebeeral palsy 

A weakened trembly condition caused by operating a CB radio for excessive lengths of time.

Disgusted local trucker: That electronics-whiz kid down the block from me is so proud of his new two-way radio gear that he built all by himself from kits, and he loves to listen on his scanner and then join in on any and all conversations taking place anywhere on da "ol' 40"... I wonder that he doesn't have ceebeeral palsy by this time!

ceebeeral palsy by QuacksO September 19, 2018