PaulAllensCard's definitions

ROM Job

1. A sexual encounter with a robot

2. Being molested by someone disguised as a robot

The new generation T-3000 is fully sentient, made from high-tensile alloys, is combat ready, and gives one tornado of an erotic ROM Job.

by PaulAllensCard February 2, 2015

Spread Stick

(Prank) You take someone's "solid stick" deodorant, twist the stick all the way out, remove the deodorant, screw the bottom part back down and then *replace it with cream cheese*. NOW THIS IS IMPORTANT: Once the casing is filled, you use a butter knife to "sculpt" the cream cheese to look just like the deodorant stick. Now replace the cap, and wait for the fun.

If you're reading this you should immediately "Spread Stick" someone.

by PaulAllensCard February 2, 2015

Blummie

Slang word for a "blumpkin". Which is also a slang word. If you don't know what a blumpkin is yet, then fuck you

To-do list: 1. Buy a new garden hose 2. Install new dart board 3. Catch a blummie

by PaulAllensCard December 12, 2016

Purse Dogma

1. The irrefutable law that any woman with a purse dog is a pretentious, vapid cunt

If you brave the perils of Purse Dogma, you and your little dog are going to hell bitch

by PaulAllensCard August 15, 2020

Cosby Jacket

The arrest record of a serial rapist or sex offender ("Jacket" being an acronym for a criminal history file). A play on the infamous "Cosby Sweater".

An in-depth background check on the school janitor revealed a Cosby Jacket hidden in his closet.

by PaulAllensCard January 29, 2015

Girth Control Pills

Girth Control Pills (def., noun): Any prescription to remedy erectile dysfunction. Includes known dick pills like Viagra, Cialis and Hardonex.

~One more gash-gouging original term by AndyBones, the man who wields the net handle PaulAllensCard~

With these new girth control pills, you can literally see your own reflection on your cock!

by PaulAllensCard November 21, 2016

Ve-Gon

A spray that repels vegans

This weekend I'm driving to Santa Monica, so I'm gonna need a few cans of Ve-Gon

by PaulAllensCard February 6, 2015