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PaulAllensCard's definitions

Ve-Gon

A spray that repels vegans
This weekend I'm driving to Santa Monica, so I'm gonna need a few cans of Ve-Gon
by PaulAllensCard February 6, 2015
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Newskkake

Newskkake (noun, pron. "Nooz-Cocky", variation of root word Bukkake)

1. When annoying news or sports "reminders" explode all over your phone/ tablet/ computer notifications bar (Modern connotation)

2. When you subscribe to so many newspapers that legions of delivery boys eject their loads onto your lawn every night (Classic connotation)
(TV news anchor speaking) "We'll have more later on that possible nuke theft by ISIS, but first, more bizarre behavior by Lindsay Lohan! Apparently, LiLo has been spotted with what appears to be a custom built dildo-crackpipe hybrid, *and* what she's tweeting about it could save you money! For those of you at work, switch off your ringer and prepare for the inevitable all-day Newskkake."
by PaulAllensCard February 2, 2015
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Jungle Dusting

Sprinkling someone else's pillow with pubic hair that's been ground into dust or chopped up into tiny enough pieces that it will 1. not be easily seen or detected and 2. likely be inhaled, ingested and stuck to the face not unlike glitter.

Other names include Grinch Powder, Dream Glitter, The Salty Sandman, Fairy Dust, Pillow Peppering
"Grandma, I am so sorry to have to tell you this right now, with you being in the hospital and so ill.... Okay, remember that Christmas you gave me the 60" Vizio plasma TV when I very clearly wanted the Sony LED? Well, I jungle dusted your pillow the next time you came to stay with us. Whoo! Damn, I feel SO much better now that you know!! Bye gram-gram."

Jungle Dusting.
by PaulAllensCard January 31, 2015
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Controligarch

Controligarch English, noun: This is the fun part- YOU get to do my thinking 👍🎅🏿
Make it about your boyf, or if you ARE the quasi-abusive boyoyff then make it about your Russian gamepad issues financially driven to politically influence things on yachts with tacky gold and marble decor- it's bananas! Go nuts you deserve it
The word is "controligarch"
By the way there's some shit on the northwest corner of your touchscreen, sugarplum. Give it a wet wipe yo 💕
by PaulAllensCard January 20, 2021
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Butt Rocket

A shot of drugs up the ass via oral syringe (the kind you use to feed a baby squirrel or whatever)
I have never done a butt rocket, I'm simply reporting it's existence.
by PaulAllensCard October 13, 2015
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Flirty Sanchez

Playfully "drawing" a mustache on your partner's upper lip, with a clean finger and prior to any sexual activity
The night was going well. Carlito paused in the middle of the kiss to give Michelle a Flirty Sanchez, which should've warned her what might later touch her face.
by PaulAllensCard February 6, 2015
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Nukkake

(noun, pron. "Nu-cocky") The strategic act of war in which one country, state or province is bombarded with nuclear missiles from all angles by surrounding hostile nations. Ideally this would end once all belligerent forces have fully expended their stockpiles and the target is covered in pearly white fallout.
"Mr. President, North Korea just hit Seoul, Okinawa and Taiwan with medium-range ballistic missiles... We have all members of NATO on conference, and they unanimously voted to respond with a Nukkake."
by PaulAllensCard January 29, 2015
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