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Monkey's Dad's definitions

brashionale

An arrogant and thoughtless excuse for taking risks during coronaviral stay-at-home isolation orders.
"I figured what the hell, there's nobody out, and the liquor store wouldn't be deemed an 'essential service' if they didn't want you to go there", he coughed, his brashionale hard to understand through his labored breathing.
by Monkey's Dad April 5, 2020
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Mayor Muriel Bowser

D.C. Mayor Muriel Bowser renamed a section of 16th street, in front of the White House, “Black Lives Matter Plaza” and had the slogan painted on the pavement in massive yellow letters to honor demonstrators protesting the killing of George Floyd by police.
by Monkey's Dad June 8, 2020
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social dis-tance

Disrespect for the need for social distancing, conveyed by inadequate intervals.
Nobody was dying, the so-called 'virus' was elite liberal propaganda, and to show his feeling about social dis-tance he was marching shoulder-to-shoulder with other "Reopen America" geniuses, waving swastikas and Trump banners, blocking ambulances, breathing in each others' faces.
by Monkey's Dad April 20, 2020
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emergination

Imagining the nation emerging from lockdown.
In an act of emergination, she saw herself, and everyone in the country, opening their doors and bursting into the sunlight, hugging each other, throwing their masks in the air, breathing deeply and freely. She could dream.
by Monkey's Dad May 1, 2020
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Smart Lives Matter

Those who understand that the phrase "Please wear a mask" does not mean: 1) carry it in your hand, 2) wear it around your neck or 3) wear it covering your chin but not your mouth and nose.
YOU! Yes, you, coming within inches of me, breathing in my face, with YOUR MASK SECURED AROUND YOUR ELBOW!, please respect my right to live even if you don't care about your own, because Smart Lives Matter.
by Monkey's Dad September 13, 2020
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8 track tapeworm

A song stuck in your head, on auto-repeat since 1966.
Having blown their cash on a then-state-of-the-art sound system for the band truck, the guys only had enough to buy one tape. For the last five decades, Martha and the Vandellas had been singing endlessly in his head - "It's like a heatwave, burnin' in my hea-a-art, can't keep from a-cry-in', tearin' me apa-a-art", his personal 8 track tapeworm.
by Monkey's Dad March 8, 2020
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Red Dawn warnings

Code name for an early email chain among a prominent group of medical experts, sounding the alarm about coronavirus. For months it was ignored by the president, who said of the pandemic, "It will disappear as if by magic".
If the president had not refused to listen to the Red Dawn warnings, the pandemic could have been much more effectively controlled in the United States.
by Monkey's Dad April 12, 2020
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