Kofi's definitions

milk

(verb:) single-mindedly to masturbate a male to the point where he ejaculates his "milk" sperm. Use of this term suggests the extraction is more for the amusement and/or satisfaction of the "milker" than that of the person selected to be "milked". (Verb also found in combinations such as: "milk the snake", "milk the milkman")

Tracy used to boast to her friends that any man she could not milk within two hours of meeting, was not worth knowing.

by Kofi May 8, 2003

cock whore

woman who is completely addicted to the most prominent male organ. Same as nymph, nympho, nymphomaniac.(Note that "whore" in this context does not usually indicate any payment is made: it simply suggests utter, often gullible submission to the servicing of males, which breeds contempt in others.)

Tray used to be Miss Cock Whore for a few years, but now she's a bit more selective about who can have her.

by kofi May 12, 2003

three-in-a-bed

A threesome as a one-off (so to speak). A three-in-a-bed is a sexual encounter between three people, usually (at least for two of those involved) for the first and last time.

A phrase beloved of the British tabloid press is "three-in-a-bed romp", which stresses bother the impermanence and the (just-for-)fun nature of the experience, thus engaging the sexual interest and desire, the envy and thus the moralising indignation of the newspaper's readers all at once!

by kofi June 30, 2003

sex worker

More neutral or sympathetic alternative to prostitute, whore. Frankly offering sex for money is seen as either a necessary or acceptable job, parallel to (say) factory work, and no stigma or sneer of contempt should be attached to its practitioners.

"Sex workers of the world unite, you have nothing to lose but your chains (unless you are happy wearing them)"

by kofi May 12, 2003

semen

scientific name for cum, jizz, jism, man milk, cream, etc. Actually the thin fluid that transports the millions of tiny, tadpole-like daddies sperm from the testicles and out of the cock when the male is suitably excited - but fluid and content are, unsurprisingly, often confused!

Tracy's ears would always prick up when she heard the word "semen", and her eyes gleamed whenever a man was as good as his word, and she had another chance to gulp down her favourite fast food.

by kofi May 12, 2003

fling

deliberately short-term sexual relationship between two people. Longer than a one-night stand, not as serious-sounding as "affair", more frankly physical than the discreet or twee "dalliance", the word has the associations of a much-needed sexual relief from stress, worry or hangups. No deep personal involvement required, just the sex and a bit of attention.

Office gossip: Oh, by the way, I heard about your secretary's latest fling!
Minor boss: Whaurrgh (choking on his croissant) - How did you find out?
Office gossip: ... With one of the young trainees. Hey, just a minute (grinning with delight) ....
Minor boss: What? Look, I didn't say anything! Err ... which trainee? (under his breath: the double-dealing BITCH!)

by kofi May 14, 2003

pull off

1) (sex): to wanka man so that he ejaculates (alternatives: jerk off, jack off)
2) (soccer): to substitute a player, i.e remove him from the game.
Warning: Be very careful not to confuse the two. (See example.)

The new teenage arrival at Man United was discussing terms with his agent, and was impressed. Agent: Look lad, you'll only earn about 30 grand the first year. Kid: 30 grand? brilliant! At Rochdale, I only got a couple of quid a week! Agent: And they'll be starting you off with just a basic Mercedes. Kid: Mercedes? Brilliant! At Rochdale, I had to get the bus! Agent: And you'll have to accept last pick of the groupies. Kid: Groupies? Brilliant! At Rochdale, I had to sleep with my sister! Agent: Oh, and for the first few games, Sir Alex may want to pull you off at half time. Kid: Pull me off? Fantastic! At Rochdale, we only got a slice of orange and a cup of tea! ......

by kofi May 14, 2003