John Heinz Kerry's definitions

kilt

A pussy cover worn by Scottish "men." Reminds men who do not wear dresses why Scotland has never been a factor in any war since about 500 b.c.

Hey sweetie, when you're done ironing your kilt, bring your ass over here and play my bagpipe.

by John Heinz Kerry August 21, 2006

Anti-crime vaccine

Death by lethal injection. Texas's solution to population control.

They finally gave Spookie-tookie the anti-crime vaccine last week. Yeeeaaahhh boooyyeeee!

by John Heinz Kerry December 19, 2005

guyliner

Makeup put on by a guy taking his first steps toward becoming a tranny.

Only the most FLAAAAAAAAAAMING homosexual would wear guyliner.

by John Heinz Kerry December 28, 2005

sporch

the sound a turd makes when it hits the water of the crapper.

Bob went for the courtesy flush after hearing the sporch, in order to avoid having to take the walk of shame.

by John Heinz Kerry November 12, 2004

Tookie

(1) To feed worms with a dirt nap that began around 12:30 am December 13, 2005. Shot in the arm by the anti-crime vaccine. Hooray for the needle.

(2) To show cawardice by founding one of the most despicable and hateful organizations in the history of mankind; fearing death because of your murder conviction; showing no remorse for killing four innocent people; and then writing children's books because you fear retribution for your crimes.

I hope they soon go Tookie on Scott Peterson, instead of letting him sit around for 30 years and find a reason we should feel sorry for killing him.

by John Heinz Kerry December 29, 2005

tookie

Rhymes with "spookie," a man who killed four people over about $100 in cash & then got scared & found "redemption" when he learned he was going to get the anti-crime vaccine. Complete coward.

Tookie should've been put to death about 3 weeks after he killed those four innocent people, instead of the Cullyforneean government waiting 25 years to finally pull the trigger.

by John Heinz Kerry December 19, 2005

Urbtards

the Down's Syndromed, public-school-dropout morons who put definitions on urbandictionary and flaunt their stupidity by:

(1) misspelling or misabbreviating a word;
(2) using the wrong word ("there" instead of "their"); or
(3) having no fucking idea how to use an apostrophe.

Hey Allison, don't you hate it when those urbtards type "gr8" instead of "great"? How much fucking work is it to type 2 extra letters?

by John Heinz Kerry November 10, 2004