Definitions by I Saw U2 Live Twice

Milli Vanilli 

Officially, Milli Vanilli was a techno-dance singing duo consisting of Rob Pilatus of Germany and Fabrice Morvan of France. They released one album in late 1988, "Girl You Know is True". From that period up to early 1990 it spawned five Top 10 hits - the title track, the #1 "Don't Forget My Number", the #1 "Girl I'm Gonna Miss You", the #1 "Blame It On the Rain" and entering the new decade with "All or Nothing". In early 1990, they were caught lip-synching "Blame It On the Rain" live on TV during a music awards show. The previous year the tape skipped during a "concert" that also revealed the duo's lip-synching. Allegations flew. Later in the year the duo said they wanted to do some real singing on their next album. They revealed to a music employee that all they did for the record was pose for the album cover and have the project credited to them under the name "Milli Vanilli". The shit really hit the fan after that. The duo's album sold multi-platinum but was soon deleted. They had to return their Grammy for Best New Group, the first time that ever happened. Milli Vanilli was disgraced in what is possibly the biggest sham in music history. Still, they were used in a Pepsi TV ad the following year, lip-synching to an opera record. A year later, they released an album under their real names, supposedly the vocals were the duo's own. It sank like a stone in a pond. Pilatus commited suicide in 1998. Fabrice is still living. The term "Milli Vanilli" now is used to denote fraud and fakery.

Since that time other performers like Madonna, Ashlee Simpson and Britney Spears have been caught lip-synching on stage. Not as much fuss has been made about any of that. Hmmmm. It's a damn shame that the Milli Vanilli story has come to what it is. Their first album has some really good songs on it, but they will never be released again and we probably never will hear them again because of the big scandal. There's some terrific music on it, it's just a shame that the wrong people got all the credit for it.

Milli Vanilli by I Saw U2 Live Twice December 9, 2007

Phil the Shill 

"Phil the Shill" is the title of an episode of Miami Vice that starred Phil Collins as a scam artist who immigrated to America from his native U.K. to escape taxes and prosecution. He was a TV game show host, later on he took a suitcase with over a million bucks in it and vanished. He reappeared on cable TV as televangelist "Father Phil", perfoming fake exorcisms and saying "give me your money, and I will give you a miracle". Phil Collins in real life is noted for his charm and amiability, and his portraying of an iritable greedy bastard shows that he makes a good actor as well as musician. He acted in theater as a kid and made his movie debut as a crowd extra in "A Hard Day's Night". Also check out the flick "Buster" from 1988.

Luke: Whatcha watchin' on the boob tube, dude?

George: Just a stupid infomercial hosted by Phil the Shill.

Phil the Shill by I Saw U2 Live Twice December 9, 2007

Ha Ha, Charade you are! 

a line in the song "Pigs", from the Pink Floyd album {Animals]. The band is making fun at British politicians, although the sentiments can be applied just about anywhere.

You bus stop ratbag. Ha Ha, Charade you are!
You fucked up old hag! Ha Ha, Charade you are!

... hand over heart ... I'd say you're a laugh ...
but you're really a cryyyyyy-iii-iiiiyyyyyyyyyyy

Ha Ha, Charade you are! by I Saw U2 Live Twice December 9, 2007

kool aid

a cheap refreshing drink that comes in the form of a powder in a packet. Comes in many, many flavors. Just add water. Non-carbonated, the drink is promoted on TV by the walking Kool Aid pitcher. He holds a picture and a cup filled with the drink and says "Ohhhh yeahhh!" as he crashes through a wall. Jim Jones and his People's Temple cult in the Jonestown compound in Guyana commited mass suicide by drinking Kool Aid laced with cyanide.

Mom: Are you thirsty? I got some grape flavored Kool Aid.

Kids: Kool Aid! Kool Aid!
Tastes great!
Kool Aid! Kool Aid!
Can't wait!
Kool Aid! Kool Aid!
Tastes great!
Kool Aid! Kool Aid!
Can't wait!
Yaaayyyyy for Kool Aid!

kool aid by I Saw U2 Live Twice December 9, 2007

Champ 

Vermont's counterpart to Scotland's Loch Ness Monster, which has been theorized to possibly be a marine dinosaur that didn't get extinct when the space object slammed into the Yucatan and kicked up a lot of dust all those years ago. Between Vermont and New York State is Lake Champlain, which is reputed to have such a monster living there. So naturally because of the lake's name this beast is referred to by regional residents as the "Champ".

When I first visited Vermont I came from Montreal and drove a few hours thru the Quebec countryside. I went to St. Albans which is directly on the shores of Lake Champlain. The lovely Green Mountains were in view. I asked a nearby New Englander if that body of water was Lake Champlain. He said yes. I asked him if he'd ever seen the Champ, he said "Not lately".

Champ by I Saw U2 Live Twice December 2, 2007

Michael Jordan 

The greatest hoopster of all time. He knows he's the greatest basketball player ever, but he NEVER bragged about his skills. He IS the greatest but he never said, "I am the greatest". He just let his playing do the talking. He was discovered by talent agents when he was attending college (was it in South Carolina, or some place else? Anybody know?). He got his college degree and THEN told the sports officials, "OK. Let's roll." A good example for younger people. He played for the Chicago Bulls and took them to NBA Championships for a number of years. He temporarily retired in 1993 after his dad was murdered by a couple of slime buckets. He got into pro baseball for a while, he didn't really shine so much there but he was laying low because when his father was killed he was afraid that he'd maybe be next. Later in the 90s when he returned to the hoops he got a standing O from everyone - even the opposing team members, even though they knew that Michael is such a powerhouse player and that he'd lead the Bulls again to kick their asses, and that's what happened of course. He finally retired again while still on top, and reappeared for a short while playing for the Washington Wizards before hanging it up for good. His positive non-egocentric attitude, his actions for charitable causes and easygoing nature makes him a real hero. In the meantime he has been featured in TV ads like one he did for some brand of hot dog ("They're goooood!"). Yeah, I bet they are. Yummy! He also starred with the Looney Tunes in a nice movie called "Space Jam". It was a bit simple, but it still wasn't too bad. Check it out. It ain't no "The Empire Strikes Back" or "Dancing With Wolves" but it ain't no "Sibling Rivalry" either. I've seen a LOT more awful flicks than that one, and I've seen some really horrible ones. Michael also showed his humanness when at the end of the Bulls regaining the championship top he ran into the locker room and cried because his father wasn't alive to see this moment of triumph. He was openly bawling when the press interviewed him. He was never afraid to show his emotion in front of zillions like that. Now that's a real adult man, a genuine superstar, a real super trouper. A true winner all the way.
Still, once word got around that Chicago had won another NBA championship, nothing Michael or any other Bulls could say could stop fans outside the arena from rioting and trashing the streets downtown in the Windy City. Some people can be such cretins.

Winter 1993. Pat comes up to me and Mike. He says, "We gonna root and bet for the Cleveland team again?" Normally, we'd say yes but this time I ask him who's the opposing team tonight. Pat says, "Chicago Bulls". I say, "Oh no no no! It might be nice if Cleveland wins again tonight, but when you add the Mighty Michael Jordan to the equation, ALL BETS ARE OFF! He makes Chicago into the powerhouse juggernaut that they are. Cleveland's gonna get their asses whipped tonight. ALL BETS ARE OFF!".

Later that night we watched the drama on TV: Chicago kicked Cleveland's asses but good. We all knew they would. Michael Jordan is too good. Wanna see a man fly? You don't mess with Michael Jordan. He's the man.

Michael Jordan by I Saw U2 Live Twice December 2, 2007

Idahog

"Idahog" is a slang term for an Idaho girl, some of which are quite homely. There are very few young adult chicks in many Idaho towns, as many of them after they grow up pack up and seek their fortunes elsewhere.

Greg was on a cross-country vacation tour of the nation and one night he stayed in Pocatello. He went to Freddy's bar and picked up a girl because he "had to have his action" that night. He thought, "She's an Idahog, but she'll do."

Idahog by I Saw U2 Live Twice December 1, 2007