Definitions by H. Bruce Washington

Philadelphia Handshake 

A greeting popularized in Philadelphia, PA where two cool guys next to one another at urinals reach across and jerk each other off. Eye contact and a warm smile are a must.

Tom and I greeted one another with a Philadelphia Handshake in the men’s room at the museum, then we went outside and ran the Rocky steps.

Philadelphia Handshake by H. Bruce Washington October 19, 2022

The Philadelphia Handshake 

A greeting popularized in Philadelphia, PA where two cool guys next to one another at urinals reach across and jerk each other off. Eye contact and a warm smile are a must.

I met Tom at the museum running up the Rocky steps. After The Philadelphia Handshake in the men’s room we became very good friends.

The Philadelphia Handshake by H. Bruce Washington October 19, 2022

wasted wipe 

pulling the trigger mid-shit and wiping before you are really done.

I can’t handle the heartache of another wasted wipe.

wasted wipe by H. Bruce Washington July 7, 2021

hooded dangler 

n. an impressive flaccid dong with ample foreskin.

“Have you ever seen a hooded dangler up close?”

hooded dangler by H. Bruce Washington November 17, 2020

hipsterdick 

n. When your piss burns because you’ve consumed way too much Sriracha.

“Hey Craig, you might want to lay off the sriracha. You’re going to end up with hipsterdick.”

hipsterdick by H. Bruce Washington September 24, 2019

the Washington 

n. A soapy scrub down of the cock-and-balls at a luxury spa.

“Go see Gabe and ask him for the Washington. You won’t regret it!”

the Washington by H. Bruce Washington September 24, 2019