When you're banging a member of your family from behind and at a random moment you clap their ears. As they're laying on the floor in pain you pull out a life alert necklace, hit the button, and bail.
Bro, my second cousin was over for Thanksgiving...she's so hot I had to try to smash. After a few minutes it felt weird to be banging my cousin so I hit her with the Alabama Flashbang and told my family I had to leave for work.
by Guido and The Guy December 11, 2020
An aggressive form of syphilis only contractable by having sex with Ron Jeremy or by having his sloppy seconds. This strain of the disease turns your dick into a brown hairy mess that resembles the trunk of lovable old Mr. Snuffy.
Bro...I hooked up with this porn star last night, but I think she had just done a scene with the hedgehog. Since I got home my dick looks like a mastodon trunk and smells like the yeti. I think I have Syphilupagus
by Guido and The Guy June 07, 2019
Various forms of milk torture, including but not limited to, water boarding Joaquin Phoenix with fresh dairy (specifically because of his cleft pallet and fucked up lip)
My therapist advised me that I should start to scale it back on the intensity of my aggressive jerk sessions. My uncle owns a dairy farm, and I hate Joaquin Phoenix and cleft lips...so the inter-species wank was a no Brainer. After you finish you have to yell THE PHOENIX RISES
P.S. Your dancing sucked in The Joker, and you should have been Viper Room instead of your brother
-Brian Omey
#TheLip #DrugTester
P.S. Your dancing sucked in The Joker, and you should have been Viper Room instead of your brother
-Brian Omey
#TheLip #DrugTester
by Guido and The Guy June 28, 2023
When you get one over on everyone and then slap your dick across all of their faces.
Or
When you're on Guido and The Guy trying to say "Dickslap" but you slur the shit out of the phrase so it comes out half English half gibberish
Or
When you're on Guido and The Guy trying to say "Dickslap" but you slur the shit out of the phrase so it comes out half English half gibberish
John told everyone exactly what was going to happen...when it finally did happened he Dipslacked the entire house party.
Or
Mike was trying to say "Dickslap" but he sounded like he had a mouthful of marbles and said "Dipslack"
Or
Mike was trying to say "Dickslap" but he sounded like he had a mouthful of marbles and said "Dipslack"
by Guido and The Guy November 18, 2021
by Guido and The Guy April 24, 2023
When you stuff a 3 ft. (91.44cm) gummy worm in your partners butt hole and suck it out like you're trying to suck a a golf ball through a garden hose. Once it's completely removed, enjoy the fruits of your labor together.
The gummy worm I hoovered out of your mom's butt hole looked like an earthworm by the time it came out, so we enjoyed The Yummy Gummy with extra sauce.
by Guido and The Guy May 28, 2023
CUM stands for..
Creamy
Unicorn
Milk
🦄 🥛
Best described for a woman's mythical juice, but the man's can be mythical in the sense of doing it on command. Mainly done in porn, it usually seems like it's a 1 way street of the men in the sense of jizzing, unless the woman screams like her pussy is being murdered and loves it. In a recent surge of step siblings having sexual escapades, it is unlikely for both to get off a load of splooge since they are afraid of being caught since it is sooo taboo. What are we talking about?.. oh yea.. CUM.. ummm.. Best by yourself, but try it with a partner..
The end
Creamy
Unicorn
Milk
🦄 🥛
Best described for a woman's mythical juice, but the man's can be mythical in the sense of doing it on command. Mainly done in porn, it usually seems like it's a 1 way street of the men in the sense of jizzing, unless the woman screams like her pussy is being murdered and loves it. In a recent surge of step siblings having sexual escapades, it is unlikely for both to get off a load of splooge since they are afraid of being caught since it is sooo taboo. What are we talking about?.. oh yea.. CUM.. ummm.. Best by yourself, but try it with a partner..
The end
Jack pulls out Jill aka his hand and Jack was so jacked that he had to jack off while playing jacks. Jack CUMs on a Jack in the box who is ironically his step brother. Jill in rage squeezes Jack until he has a pop goes the weasel moment. He used the jacks in cards next to him to clean off Jill since he is a gentleman since it was all he had lying around next to him. Jill didn't know jackshit about why she was there and felt like a jackass after hitting a big black bottle of Jack that was much bigger than Jack. Jack fell down, and broke his crown, and Jill supposedly CAME tumbling after..
by Guido and The Guy April 28, 2021