Definitions by Eaton Holgoode

Dry and Crusty 

A colloquial expression used to describe any situation that is unsavory, unsatisfactory or in very poor condition.

I haven't had sex in months. I'm sort of dry and crusty.

I didn't wipe my ass very well. It's stating to get dry and crusty.

Have you met our new boss? Yes he's pretty dry and crusty.

Stan's mother could never figure out why his tube socks were always so dry and crusty until her friend explained it to her.

Dry and Crusty by Eaton Holgoode January 14, 2016

Dirty Diner 

Reference to a male's or female's booty that is dined upon by their sexual partner in a spirited bout of analingus but it's found to simply be too raunch and unclean to continue.

Did you eat her ass out braaaahhh?
I tried broohhhh but it was a dirty diner and I just had to back out. I can still smell it in my nose and it's been like 3 days ago yo!

Dirty Diner by Eaton Holgoode January 14, 2016

Fisherman's Knot

The promptly tied, mess avoiding, knot made at the open end of a sperm filled condom. The knot is tied quickly upon withdrawal and unsheathing the penis to avoid any leakage of errant cum.

After nutting up full the reservoir end of his lamb skin sheath, Dan quickly pulled out and secured his load with a Fisherman's Knot.

Fisherman's Knot by Eaton Holgoode January 13, 2016

Droopy Sock 

A condom that won't stay skin tight against a turgid male phalus due to a lack of penile girth. In the case of a droopy sock, penile length is meaningless and the condom sags down the shaft like an old sock with the elastic worn out.

While Carl was blessed with inches, he was not blessed with girth. His pencil dick was unable to support condom use as it always turned into a droopy sock.

Droopy Sock by Eaton Holgoode January 13, 2016

Socket Wrench 

To finger a person's vaginal or anal oriface(s) with a general left to right, back and forth, twisting motion as if one was tightening a bolt or nut with a socket wrench. Ideally performed with two to three fingers however and aggressive socket wrencher could perform said act with the entire hand and fist.

Mary could barely walk after Carl gave her a double fisted socket wrench.

Socket Wrench by Eaton Holgoode January 12, 2016

Nuzzle Job

Poking the end of your nose into your girl's or Guy's juicy brown spot. Nose poking their bum for pleasure. Not to be confused with brown nosing.

Sandy archer her back and spread her juicy brown and Carlos dove right in for a hot wet nuzzle job.

Nuzzle Job by Eaton Holgoode January 12, 2016

Gift Bagging 

Tea bagging your mate on their birthday, anniversary or Christmas when they weren't expecting to receive such a wonderful surprise.

Gary woke up his girlfriend on Christmas morn by gift bagging her.

Gift Bagging by Eaton Holgoode January 12, 2016