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Carl Willis's definitions

nuke

vt.

1. To attack with a nuclear weapon, or to otherwise bring about widespread and utter destruction.

2. To cook a foodstuff in a microwave oven (it is a common misconception that microwave energy is a form of nuclear radiation).

3. To delete a computer user's accounts without warning, typically for abuse.
1. After years of patent hostility, US Emperor-For-Life George Bush finally nuked France in 2020, resulting in the formation of the "Freedom Sea".

2. "Just nuke those vegetables for five minutes on High, it's much quicker than steaming them."

3. The webhosting company nuked Jamal's "penile enhancement" sites because he was caught spamming.
by Carl Willis March 12, 2005
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the Res

Bill got a liquor license for his shop down on the Res, and needless to say, he ain't doing too bad!

All the casinos are down on the Res.
by Carl Willis August 27, 2004
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kav

adjective describing something incredibly awesome, like a double backflip
Dude! That was Kav!
by carl willis March 22, 2014
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dear leader

Proper noun. Personal epithet associated with either of two autocratic heads-of-state: Kim Jong-Il (N. Korea) or George W. Bush (United States).
"The Dear Leader spoke to the assembled farmworkers today, thanking them for being the pillars of this great and prosperous nation and exhorting them to even greater achievements, on pain of death by firing squad."

"Colbert spared no mercy for the tender feelings of the Dear Leader at the White House Press Corps dinner, but miraculously he has not yet been put to death by firing squad."
by Carl Willis June 11, 2006
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where I come from

Cliche phrase. Used as preface for one's remarks about the hardships of his or her life, ostensibly to add validity to the point that follows. Essentially any statement beginning with this phrase can be summarized as follows: "I have had a much harder life than you and hence you are in no position to argue with my point that (blah blah blah)."
"Where I come from, a nigga's rich if he can slang a 20 rock every week. So dontchoo be calling yoself PO', white boah!"
by Carl Willis September 2, 2004
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ETS

n. (Educational Testing Service) A white-collar corporate gang in Ewing, New Jersy, headed by Kurt Landgraf. They peddle the SAT and GRE assessment products on the street to vulnerable youths who don't know how to say NO. A greedy parasite that should be eliminated for the betterment of society. See also: Tollbooth on the highway of education.
Those poor students had to pony up $115 to the ETS in order to get admitted to college.

"We da ETS, we be hangin' wif da Kurt-rock, and we be all up in your shit if you don't pay us your protection, FOOL!"

Kurt, I'm gonna bring my posse up on ETS turf and get me a goddamn refund one of these days CHUMP!
by Carl Willis May 21, 2004
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pops

n. One's father.
DaLonte, whatup holmes! I saw yo pops be hustlin' crack up on Fifth and Lee, so he musta got his ass paroled or somethin'.

You gonna hafta take dat shit up wif Pops, 'cause girl, I sho-as-hell don't give a damn!
by Carl Willis April 30, 2004
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