Carl Willis's definitions

nuke

vt.

1. To attack with a nuclear weapon, or to otherwise bring about widespread and utter destruction.

2. To cook a foodstuff in a microwave oven (it is a common misconception that microwave energy is a form of nuclear radiation).

3. To delete a computer user's accounts without warning, typically for abuse.

1. After years of patent hostility, US Emperor-For-Life George Bush finally nuked France in 2020, resulting in the formation of the "Freedom Sea".

2. "Just nuke those vegetables for five minutes on High, it's much quicker than steaming them."

3. The webhosting company nuked Jamal's "penile enhancement" sites because he was caught spamming.

by Carl Willis March 12, 2005

thugged out

Adj. Presenting the outward appearance of one's identification with urban ghetto culture through affected attitudes, mannerisms, language, or dress.

Deshante sauntered slowly to the principal's office in his F.U.B.U jacket and do rag, making his best effort to look thugged out despite being only twelve years old.

by Carl Willis July 28, 2003

kav

adjective describing something incredibly awesome, like a double backflip

Dude! That was Kav!

by carl willis March 22, 2014

crack whore

n. A female who provides sexual services in exchange for rocks of crack cocaine, upon which she is physiologically dependent.

Daequon's bitch a crack ho--you gotta git out the rock before you can git out the cock, dogg. Dat's just how it works.

by Carl Willis February 10, 2004

jack in the box

n. West-coast fast food chain. Your one-stop shop for E. coli and salmonella.

I ate at Jack In The Box for lunch, and an hour later, the highly caustic diarrhea had already melted my colon.

by Carl Willis July 23, 2006

creation science

n. A fundamentalist Christian outreach concept, in which the intent is to "debunk" science with the word of scripture. Its most vocal adherents are southern and mid-western U.S. evangelical protestants (see Bible Thumper.) Creation "scientists" try to convince "unsaved" people that the Earth was formed in a Creation that took place at the hands of Almighty God a few thousand years ago, and hope their evidence will convert a few of these "unsaved" people to the faith.

Some key tenets of Creation Science:

--Scientists (the real ones) are going to Hell, where they will burn forever for blasphemy of the Holy Word of God.

--"Evolution" is a scam to trick us into believing that wholesome, white Christians have common ancestry with apes and chimps and (oh no, please no...) black people! Evolution is the Devil's Theory (yes, it is just a theory).

--Hell is real, full of sulfur, and it exists in the center of the Earth. (Most persons on Earth will be summarily cast into this Lake of Fire when we pass away.)

Unfortunately, unlike real scientists, Creation Scientists face a non-existent job market. Most find work in blue-collar manufacturing jobs, or else provide for their families by huntin' sqwirls, 'coons and o-possum. Their hobbies range from watching NASCAR, to whippin' the kids, to attending Klan and CCC rallies. Prrrraise Jesus!

Question: How old is this part of the Grand Canyon?

Scientist: This formation is about five million years old, according to our best uranium-lead dating...

Creation Scientist: Them there canyon ain't no more 'n' maybe 4000 years ole,' and if you done believe otherwise, you're a Hellbound sinner, praise the Lord! Now please op'n' all yawl's Bibles to Genesis, Chapter Six and let us remind ourselves of the word of God...

by Carl Willis December 14, 2004

dime brizzle

n. A ten-dollar whore. As with most of the new "-izzle" vocabulary invented by Snoop Dogg, the etymology is uncertain and the meaning must be inferred largely through context. "Brizzle" is thought by some to be a derivative of "broad".

"I got a living room full of fine dime brizzles, waiting on the Pizzle, the Dizzle, and the Shizzle..."

by Carl Willis February 9, 2005