Sneak peek at Jesus

To have a near-death experience.

Neil: "Wow, Vince, we all thought you were a goner. I never saw somebody survive being sexually molested by a polar bear!"

Vince: "Dude, I got a sneak peek at Jesus."

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

turkish bread

(n.) A condition afflicting an unhygenic vagina which may or may not be malodorous and produces little crusty pellets that may adhere to the vulva or collect in the panties. Turkish bread may be a result of any of several infections commonly associated with a woman's pussy or simply the result of not washing one's stanky snatch. Reportedly, turkish bread has a cheese-like flavor and is viewed as a delicacy to be spread on Triscuits or Ritz in some circles.

Nichole's turkish bread finally got to me after after all these years. Night after night of gagging on that crust just got to me; I had to leave.

by Blenderhead91 March 26, 2009

E.L.D.

(n.) Abbreviation for "Explosive Liquid Diarrhea," a very unpleasant gastro-intestinal condition, indeed.

"Mom, I gotta stay home from school today. I have E.L.D. and didn't quite make it to the can in time."

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

crotch crustacean

(n.) a pubic louse; the crabs.

I contracted a case of the crotch crustaceans from the trousers I purchased at the Salvation Army Thrift Store. Of course the old lady just ain't buying it...

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

Ninety-percent water, ten-percent vinegar

n.) a douche

adj.) the condition of being a douche.

Karl is ninety-percent water, ten-percent vinegar. As a matter of fact, he is the biggest douche I know.

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

taintular cystosis

(n.) a condition in which one has developed a cyst on one's taint. Eventually, it will surface and drain, usually oozing copious quantities of thick pus. Trust me, this hurts.

Phil: How's the taintular cystosis treating you, Bob?

Bob: I got that fucker drained, dude. The relief...it was better than sex! And what came out of it...looked like a half cup of mashed potatos!

Phil: Dude....gross.

by blenderhead91 April 25, 2010

Reversible Yam

(n.) The external genitalia of a woman; the vulva.

"Look at the camel-toe of Glennis! I betcha her reversible yam is in need of a good noshing!"

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009