twat junk

A cheesy, foul-smelling paste produced by a chronically unwashed vagina. Frequently, it will collect around the vulva where it waits to ambush the unsuspecting when panties are removed in anticipation of (usually oral)intercourse. Twat junk is commonly associated with various infections of the cunt and invariably forms pasty little pellets that may adhere to the labia or collect in the undergarments.

I hope Neil used a gasmask when he went down on Darlene. That girl's twat junk is just plain noxious!

by Blenderhead91 March 26, 2009

Sneak peek at Jesus

To have a near-death experience.

Neil: "Wow, Vince, we all thought you were a goner. I never saw somebody survive being sexually molested by a polar bear!"

Vince: "Dude, I got a sneak peek at Jesus."

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

turkish bread

(n.) A condition afflicting an unhygenic vagina which may or may not be malodorous and produces little crusty pellets that may adhere to the vulva or collect in the panties. Turkish bread may be a result of any of several infections commonly associated with a woman's pussy or simply the result of not washing one's stanky snatch. Reportedly, turkish bread has a cheese-like flavor and is viewed as a delicacy to be spread on Triscuits or Ritz in some circles.

Nichole's turkish bread finally got to me after after all these years. Night after night of gagging on that crust just got to me; I had to leave.

by Blenderhead91 March 26, 2009

crotch crustacean

(n.) a pubic louse; the crabs.

I contracted a case of the crotch crustaceans from the trousers I purchased at the Salvation Army Thrift Store. Of course the old lady just ain't buying it...

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

E.L.D.

(n.) Abbreviation for "Explosive Liquid Diarrhea," a very unpleasant gastro-intestinal condition, indeed.

"Mom, I gotta stay home from school today. I have E.L.D. and didn't quite make it to the can in time."

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

Black and Decker Pussy Wrecker

n.) An astoundingly large penis capable of causing trauma if used for regular vaginal intercourse.

I gave Judy the Black and Decker Pussy Wrecker. She hasn't walked right for a week.

by Blenderhead91 March 31, 2009

Getting Mud for the Turtle

To engage in anal intercourse; to insert one's penis into another's rectum.

I accidently walked in on Dad and Aunt Gloria. he had her bent over and was getting mud for the turtle. I may need to seek therapy.

by Blenderhead91 April 10, 2009