A cultural black-hole in the centre of England inhabitted by things approaching homo-sapiens. Notorious for its population's inbreeding and disregard for social standards, Wigston has become one of the top 50 'Chav-towns' of the UK. Not unlike some other areas of the UK (such as Scarborough et al.), Wigston's air is composed of very different substances to the rest of the world; at last test, the pot/cigarette smoke level was at 20,000 parts per million, making the air almost unbreathable by all except hardened
residents and chavs.
Despite the fact that the majority of Wigston is a God-forsaken hell-hole, there are some isolated pockets of civilisation, such as where 'the writer' lives and Birkenshaw's
geography classroom. Other areas whose population's combined IQ is more than 10 include the public library and most of the local dog kenels.
Places to avoid in Wigston include
Willow park, Blaby road park (commonly
known as 'Down Souf'), McDonalds, Welford road, Little Hill, Guthlaxton college, South Wigston, the Monsell, Oadby road and more-or-less
everywhere else.
"Y'all ever go to Wigston?"
"Yeah, went there last week."
"What'cha think?"
"Biggest piece of POC on
the planet. I hope it gets nuked. Oh, other than Birkenshaw's domain."
"Woo! Birko!"
A typical Wigston
conversation:
"YOO B'LAD!! Yaz
wanna go down 'souf and eat some a'dose firecrackaz?"
"Yeah, boi! Soundez badazz!! Shouldz ahh bring Rahi!?"
"Nahh mahn, he'z dah shit..."