tuba girl
the insainly rare breed of tuba players. they're actually female, or at least appear to be. some pick the tuba for the attention, some (like me) choose it because it's fun to play and also to sneak up behind people with it and blast it on their head. these brave (or not so much) tuba players have to lug big ass tubas everywhere (damn you flute players), and in colder climates, deal with the mouthpiece being frozen to their mouths when playing, which goes for other instruments like the trumpet and such, but with the tuba it's more obvious. can also be used as an insult for a chick that farts a lot.
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