The study of the social issues of thirstiness; the ongoing effort to find ways to counteract the detrimental effects of thirst: neediness, attention-whoring, paper-chasing, overt eagerness, creeping, and desperateness. A professional thirstologist has a responsibility to educate the public on how to avoid quenching thirst by cupcaking or simping.

When you eat dirt for the first time and leave your family to build a shack in the woods