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textinitis

The supposed condition that millions upon millions of people have that comes from "texting". From hand cramps to tendinitis.
Wow! He has textinitis so bad, his hands are are looking like "hook hands". The guy texts so much, he looks like he has "sloth fingers". Ha ha, he's got textinitis so bad, he's got some "eagle claws" going.
textinitis by madinsomniac July 19, 2009

Textonics 

Textual Ebonics
Words used to describe ones emotions, actions, etc. in text messages
I see you have just purchased your first phone, you may need to learn textonics from a more experienced cell phone owner.
Textonics by SmiteM3 January 6, 2009

tentanitus 

A disease in which it causes you to become a homosexual.
“Ryan came out they other day, looks like he's got tentanitus“.
tentanitus by boobs&pee November 6, 2019

Tarkovian-vascular-testinitus 

Tarkovian-vascular-testinitus: Noticeable Swelling of the Male Testicular Region. Results from over exposure from a Popular fps MMO Shooter Escape from Tarkov. May produce long lasting reproproductive harm, and thus the inability to reproduce.

Symptom's of Tarkovian-vascular-testinitus include: Trouble taking deep breaths, increased need to write code or hacks that allows yourself or others to cheat to win inside Escape from Tarkov, purchase 3rd party cheats or hacks from others who lack the ability to reproduce and most likely live in the basement of parents home. Using Real Currency to purchase otherwise free ingame lootables, example: roubles, guns, armor, keys, etc. An overwhelming sense of insecurity of ones Pee pee, inability to complete sentences, make direct eye contact with the opposite sex

This definition has not been approved by the FDA and has no clear and or concise way of preventing its outcome except as to not play Escape from Tarkov because you are just bad at it.
subject 1: Have you noticed anything wrong with subject 3 recently?
subject 2: Yes it appears subject 3 has a very noticeable growth to his Groinal region.

subject 1: Pretty sure he has contracted Tarkovian-vascular-testinitus
subject 2: Should we possibly speak to his wife?
subject 1: Nope, if she hasn't noticed by now what's the point.

Tarkovian-vascular-testinitus 

Tarkovian-vascular-testinitus: Noticeable Swelling of the Male Testicular Region. Results from over exposure from a Popular fps MMO Shooter Escape from Tarkov. May produce long lasting reproproductive harm, and thus the inability to reproduce.

Symptom's of Tarkovian-vascular-testinitus include: Trouble taking deep breaths, increased need to write code or hacks that allows yourself or others to cheat to win inside Escape from Tarkov, purchase 3rd party cheats or hacks from others who lack the ability to reproduce and most likely live in the basement of parents home. Using Real Currency to purchase otherwise free ingame lootables, example: roubles, guns, armor, keys, etc. An overwhelming sense of insecurity of ones Pee pee, inability to complete sentences, make direct eye contact with the opposite sex

This definition has not been approved by the FDA and has no clear and or concise way of preventing its outcome except as to not play Escape from Tarkov because you are just bad at it.
subject 1: Have you noticed anything wrong with subject 3 recently?
subject 2: Yes it appears subject 3 has a very noticeable growth to his Groinal region.

subject 1: Pretty sure he has contracted Tarkovian-vascular-testinitus
subject 2: Should we possibly speak to his wife?
subject 1: Nope, if she hasn't noticed by now what's the point.
More from Urban Dictionary

square grouper

Nickname given to bales of marijuana thrown overboard or out of airplanes. Origin is reportedly from members of the US Coast Guard in the area of Southern Florida.
"Base we've got some square groupers floating outside of Miami harbor."
square grouper by slipsheet November 6, 2004
Word of the Day on October 7, 2026
A girl who does ballet and only talks about ballet. Her schedule is filled with dance classes which does not allow her to do any other activity.
"Hey, do you know that girl Sally?"

"Yeah, she's kind of annoying. All she ever talks about it ballet."

"Wow, what a Bunhead."

"Hey Sally, you want to hang out this weekend?"
"I can't, I have dance."
"You're such a Bunhead."

"Yeah... I know."
Bunhead by Jen00 October 24, 2014
Word of the Day on October 6, 2026

trucker's tan 

A sunburn or suntan focused on the left arm. It is caused by the left side of the body being the only half that gets exposed to sunlight while driving. Presumably, it would be located on the right side of the body in countries where they drive on the left side of the road.
I had a trucker's tan after driving for 10 straight hours on a sunny day.
Word of the Day on October 5, 2026
The phenomenon where adults salivate at children's toys
Every time I walk into the toy aisle, I catch myself kidulting over the latest action figures and LEGO sets!
kidulting by Emotional Cruiser October 12, 2025
Word of the Day on October 4, 2026
British slang for a scientist or technical expert, esp . when the speaker is not certain of the expert’s specific field of study. Not necessarily derogatory, but typically used by persons without a technical background. In the US, the equivalent would be “egghead”, “squint”, or “geek.”

Origin of the word is unknown. Started sometime in World War 2. Given the typical evolution of British slang, could easily have started because what these experts did was confusing or “baffling” to the common person.
According to the boffins downstairs, the murderer used a serrated blade.
Boffin by Agnon February 11, 2023
Word of the Day on October 3, 2026

Pee Calculus

When you have to pee in a movie but don’t want to miss anything, and must do the following mental equation: will the amount I have to pee cause enough discomfort to diminish my attention capacity for the remainder of the movie to an extent which is greater than the amount of the movie I would miss by making a mad dash to the restroom.
I saw Satantango last night, wonderful film but by the 5th hour I had to start doing pee calculus.
Pee Calculus by anorlondo October 1, 2026
Word of the Day on October 2, 2026
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