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Genetically disfigured spermatozoa which can potentially bore mentally and/or physically impaired offspring once mated with an unfertilized egg. Common among male inbred species (see: hicks) and those who undertake long periods of celibacy without masturbation. The chances of producing tardpoles can be minimized by strict adherence to ALL of the following:

1. Prevention of any injury to the gonads.
2. Avoidance of mating with one's sister, cousin, and/or other close relative.
3. Frequent stimulation of the penis until after ejaculation has been achieved.
"Dude, Ortiz just got beaned in the sack by a 95 mph fastball...He'll be shooting tardpoles from now on."
tardpole by MJDP May 4, 2008
Related Words

tardsome 

Norman left his laptop on his car roof, and drove off. It was tardsome.
tardsome by benth September 26, 2008

Tardnold 

A friend who's a (re)tard and walks fast with his head down and avoids conversations with others. He thinks he's cooler than his "friends" that carry Macbook Pros with his Lenovo Thinkpad. Also enjoys playing games with kids who are less than 10. He's also Jewish as he plays Combat Arms, APB, and all F2P games in general. Also, generally in a butthurt mood. Generally, a complete retard who's Jewish.
It's 7am. Our subject, Tardnold, is now in the mood for something a little "hardcore". he puts on his noise canceling gaming headset and goes to his pornographic website of choice. he finds a nice video and gets into position. unknown to tardnold, he forgot to lock his bedroom door, and his mother happens to bring him a plate of pancakes for breakfast. she is horrified at the site of this. her own son jacking off. she taps him on the shoulder, and he flips, accidentally dropping his laptop on the ground, and the plate of pancakes in his mother's hand. left on the ground is a mass of computer parts, maple syrup, and the semen of the subject. No laptop. No pancakes. No respect from his mother. Tardnold
Tardnold by Swaggatron October 23, 2011

tardocracy

A society whose political system is characterised by the rule of fucktards.
Under George W Bush, America became the world's premier tardocracy.

The Palin 2012 campaign proposes a new benchmark for tardocracy.
tardocracy by Pipe Downn October 24, 2010

Tardogoloid 

Tardogoloid is said to someone whenever they act retarded and also like a mong so basically mega retarded
Mike: dude look at james hes so retarded
Lucas: Retarded? More like Tardogoloid
Mike: Oh shit you right you are so right he is a tardogoloid thanks mate i will put that in my dictionary thanks so much
Tardogoloid by Conqueror April 6, 2020

Tardo Retardo 

1. One who acts like a tardo but is not certifiably retarded.

2. You have your suspicions but you just can't prove they are indeed retarded.
"OMG Kelly, Tardo Retardo was licking the frost off my car windows this morning!"
Tardo Retardo by TB_26 February 27, 2009
More from Urban Dictionary
NYC people who migrate north to Quahog, RI to see the leaves in the fall.
New York and everyone from there can fornicate themselves with an iron stick.
leafers by ss++ February 8, 2005
Word of the Day on September 27, 2026

Respectfully 

Precedes or follows either a gratuitously disrespectful or honest remark, originated in New York City. Used in similar fashion to "no offense" or "to be honest," interchangeably.
Ya mans is wild buns, respectfully. Respectfully he's washed.

After school, The Modells on Jamaica Ave was active. Respectfully.
Respectfully by john quan the first December 20, 2020
Word of the Day on September 26, 2026

You met me at a very Chinese time in my life

A moment in time where you feel distinctly Chinese over all other things.
Dante: "I wish I could be Nigerian, but I can't because I'm Chinese. You met me at a very Chinese time in my life."
Word of the Day on September 25, 2026
Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.
"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"
crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007
Word of the Day on September 24, 2026
A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.
Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.
Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026
Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo 

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.
DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.
murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021
Word of the Day on September 22, 2026
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