Spald

1) A strange, bald short man, who just doesn't care, lives in his own little world and isn't very bright.

2) A really weird face, where the person looks like an idiot, and like they just don't care, and they make a noise similar to 'myaaaah.'

1) Karl Pilkington is very spald.
2) Whoah, you just pulled a very spald face.

by HesterMotionless January 22, 2014

Spalding

The act of a man tea bagging a woman's face until she chokes to death.

When the coroner arrived, he determined the cause of death was spalding. The woman was suffocated by Mr. Cox's ridciulously huge ball sack which had already been filed on record as a deadly weapon.

by Dr. Kenneth Kaniff December 7, 2008

Spalding

5'6" leggy blonde girl with blue/green eyes, and parents who are enthusiastic about basketball. Has a generally good and slightly perverted sense of humor. At first comes off as a far off, ditzy, space cadet, but is really a deep and emotional person. Plays volleyball and basketball, and makes all the boys drool ;)

"Whoah, dude have you seen the new girl? She's totally Spalding material!"

"Yeah, she's hot, I had a dream about her last night... "

by wouldilietoyou?? October 4, 2011

Spald

Noun.

To have a completely bald genital region.

Dude I railed this chick last night and she was spald. It was like doing an 11-year old.

by Tonger10 June 29, 2009

Spalding

The act of inserting a tennis racket either orally, anally, or vaginally.

That girl is is getting a good anal spalding.

by Craig spalding September 4, 2018

brown spalding

A deviant sex act in which one shaves the head of his/her partner, then takes a shit on the partner's head. "Spalding" refers to the ball manufacturer of the same name, hence the bald head.

Also known as a hot fudge sundae.

Tom: So did you give her an Alabama hot pocket?
Shaun: Nah, we wanted to try something new, so I gave her a brown spalding.

by Smeg-tastic Cack Cheese July 30, 2009

wild spalding

when your banging a girl from behind in the bathroom and you keep dunking her head in the toilet.

At first we thought he had given her a swirly the he told us he had given her a wild spalding.

by Bob cenco the 3rd April 19, 2007