shit cramps 

Cramps one gets from holding in their crap for too long. Usually happens during school or in a public place with either horrible restrooms, or none at all.

Billy: ughh!
Andrew:whats wrong man?
Billy:i dont wanna go to the resttom and my stomache is killing me!
Andy: thats shit cramps for ya.

shit cramps by Robert956 December 13, 2009

shit cramp 

a pain in the gut that is a result of having to take a big dump

"pull over, i gotta shit cramp!"

shit cramp by eureka January 22, 2004

shit cramp lamp 

A head lamp. When primitive camping and end up having to *find a spot" to shit in the middle of the night!!! It helps free up both your hands for when it's time to take care of the paperwork!!! If you've ever had to try and hold a flashlight between your shoulder and cheek so you don't get shit on it you'll realize you need a shit cramp lamp!!!

Dude, I don't think I wiped good enough last night when I shit in the woods cause my ass itches like crazy!!! Me: "did you wipe until the paper was clean?" Buddy: dude, I couldn't see cause it was completely dark out!!! Me: you need a shit cramp lamp so you can make sure you get your ass cleaned good enough!!!

shit cramp lamp by LillDaryl January 4, 2023

unscheduled shit cramp 

A shit cramp that comes from out of nowhere at a very inconvenient time and place!!!

"Hey Ted I'll be right back, I have to take care of an unscheduled shit cramp!!!"

unscheduled shit cramp by LillDaryl September 6, 2023