"Yeah my Classics teacher was just like, but you haven't finished learning the middle voice yet so how can you move onto exercise 9e, and I was just like quidcumque"

"Paul keeps trying to persuade me Xenophon is better than Thucydides and I'm just like quidcumque, the only guy who I give a shit about is Herodotus.

phone: why don’t you go to sleep tommy it’s 2 in the morning?
tommy:why don’t you die you dumbazz