punch the clock

Another euphemistic phrase coined by The Colbert Report, this time referring to the solitary action of masturbation -- "better than sex because it's on your time" therefore "Punching The Clock".
Stephen closed and locked the bathroom door, sighed, glanced at his watch, and proceeded to punch the clock.
by Not Stephen Colbert September 25, 2007
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punching the cock clock

While having sex with a pregnant woman, the fetus still in utero, forcably inserts it's fist into the male's urethra.
Through x-ray you can see the fetus punching the cock clock on his own daddy.
by Eric K. August 04, 2006
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Punching the Knuckle Clock

When you pass up a night of fun with friends and family to sit around alone at your place with porn and masturbate over and over again. During this time you wonder periodically between sessions if you made the write choice. This will often start to seem like work, but since you already passed on the fun you might as well do a good job of punching the knuckle clock...
The whole place stank of jizz and loneliness. A tear ran softly down my cheek as i continued punching the knuckle clock..
by Thedude78 September 04, 2012
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