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Small Penis Disorder 

When your wrestling partner picks you up in the hallway for missing practice

biopolar penis disorder 

Biopolar penis disorder is where your penis is attatched to your ballsack so that when it gets erect, it cannot look erect. The muscle baseline inside the penis just pulse out like a normal erect penis. This means you cannot get hard at anytime, not even in the middle of sex.
You wanna have sex?
No sorry, i have biopolar penis disorder :(

post breakup penis disorder 

Not being able to touch or look at the penis of a new partner(s) after breaking up from a long term relationship
My PBPD ( post breakup penis disorder ) kicked in so bad that I couldn't give the guy a blowie and had to skip straight to sex

Penis Traumatic Stress Disorder 

PTSD, A disorder in which a person sees and takes too much dick in their lives, causing major trauma when they see anything or anyone that looks like a penis.
Guy 1: Yo why does she have a fear of the sausages in the deli?
Guy 2: I think she has Penis Traumatic Stress Disorder

Penis Traumatic Stress Disorder 

PTSD, A disorder in which a person sees and takes too much dick in their lives, causing major trauma when they see anything or anyone that looks like a penis.
Guy 1: Yo why does she have a fear of the sausages in the deli?
Guy 2: I think she has Penis Traumatic Stress Disorder.