Painted 

To be extremely intoxicated beyond one's own knowing.

When we get to the bar, we're getting f--king painted!

Painted by bkbiggame September 3, 2014

painted 

A coloqiualism indicating a hightened state of inebriation, intoxication or any other debilitaing state resulting from inbibing excess amounts of alcohol. See wrecked, trashed, bladdered, trollied and wasted.

Dude, last night I woke up in a skip filled with mousetraps and shoelaces. We must have got totally painted.

Person 1: Glasses?
Person 2: Check
1: Ice?
2: Check
1: Various intoxicating liquors?
2: Check
1: Right, let's get painted

painted by Smee07 December 29, 2007

Painted 

Meaning: attractive

Person 1: Ayy bro you think Sammi over there is fine?
Person 2: Yeah, bro she's painted.

Painted by chase#1swag October 21, 2011

painted 

When a gay man expels himself during sexual intercourse.

That bitch painted my wood last night.

Don't sleep with him, he paints ALL the kids.

painted by Eddie B3 February 28, 2008

painted 

Having bowel movement during or after anal sex

While having anal sex with here, when I pulled out he painted all over me!!!

painted by exocomp February 4, 2018

Painted 

When a man unleashes a massive load of cum on an unsuspecting girl and her face is completely covered.

I haven't had sex in weeks, that bitch Megan is totally going to get her face painted tonight.

Painted by John Killer August 11, 2008

Painted 

To be extremely high on Marijuana

being painted is the art of being so high that your own house feels like a movie seen

“Dude I’m fucking painted”

“Last night I was so painted”

“You look painted as fuck Hoss”

Painted by TheVeryPeculiarManInTheHouse February 23, 2019