opsimiser 

an utterly destitute individual who remains resolute he will one day become rich and is therefore hateful to and actively works against the interest of all poor people in a capitalistic society.

An opsimiser is the sort of person who shows up at your block party just to make a noise complaint cause "poor folks arent allowed to have fun.

opsimiser by LazerPrincess February 6, 2021

Optimise 

To have not safe sex.

I can wait to go home and optimise your mom.

Optimise by Optimiser February 16, 2023

pc optimizer pro 

A scam popularized by a dumb fuck who infects Windows platforms with viruses and streamed it as a prank call.

Have you heard of PC optimizer pro?

pc optimizer pro by Not Merriam-Webster May 28, 2018

optimised your mainframe gigabyte storage 

when you delete files that you have accidently left on your friends server but dont want them to know what you have done.

Ran: Holy crap my server is tottaly out of space.
Gary: Check again.
Ran: Oh what the?
Gary: yeah don't worry man i just optimised your mainframe gigabyte storage

optimised your mainframe gigabyte storage by Lappy mozza January 1, 2009

optimisery 

noun. 1. sadness at the loss of a dream, falling to the depths of despair after having high hopes. 2. the cognitive dissonance of beautiful melancholy, whereby one feels deep pain and also harbors hope for the attainment of their, so far, thwarted goals. 3. state of an optimist when faced with soul-crushing rejection.

Her unrequited love has left her in a state of ultimate optimisery.

optimisery by CodeNameReservoir February 9, 2018

optimizer 

Bullshit software made up by Chinese companies as a form of making extra cash.

IOBit Advanced System Optimizer is useless, it does nothing for your computer

optimizer by nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn January 5, 2021

Optimyser 

A passion-driven Software Developer with a knack for problem-solving, who communicates honestly, takes feedback constructively, adapts humbly, and has a growth-mindset for themselves and for others.

I hired an Optimyser for my SaaS product development team. Couldn't be happier.

Optimyser by optimyser May 2, 2023