The pinnacle of all dedicated feckless cum-shedders whereby the participant aims to ejaculate more than 13 times in a 24 hour period. 13 loads in generally accepted by industry insiders as being the level that separates the men from the boys.

'I did it , I did the masturbaker's dozen! Admittedly the last six were with a floppy and the jizz was purely gaseous, but by golly I finally did it. Now it's off to the doctor for me to get some ointment for the blisters and tennis elbow..'

Masturbaker's dozen by Anonymous submissions December 10, 2016

Related Words

mastureader • masturbaters • masturhater • masterbeader • Masturater • masturbade • Masturbaker • Masturbaker's dozen • Masturbaterade • masturbaterial

Masturfaker

A guy who claims he doesn't masturbate

"Jimmy says that he doesn't masturbate."
"What a masturfaker!"

Masturfaker by Goddess by nature August 13, 2009

masturhater

a person who strongly dislikes masturbation

"hey lila wanna masturbate tonight?"

"nah im a masturhater"

masturhater by squatfucker420 January 29, 2017

Masturexagerbate

when you mimic the movements of masturbation with a range of motion that's way bigger than your actual penis

"Hey Jerry, remember when Jeff demonstrated his distaste for Professor Keen by mimicking the movements of masturbation? Do you think his penis is really that big?"

"No way, man. Jeff masturexagerbates all the time."

Masturexagerbate by LoganRed April 16, 2016

Facebook Masturbater

Creepy teens who look for seductive pictures of their friends in order to become aroused

dude, she has the hottest picture, makes me want to be a facebook masturbater.

Facebook Masturbater by titanboy2793 July 11, 2010

masturbaters

one who jerks it not only multiple times a week but multiple times a day. the kind of person you would find beating there dick in your own house or even infront of you. A person who if gets stuck in an elevator for even 5 minutes will have already wacked their magic stick once or twice. A kind of person you would find in the middle of math class with their hand in their pocket wiggling around alot letting out akward grunts. A person who can cry white tears just looking at a barbie doll.

-pete: *wiggle wiggle grunt* "Teacher may i go to the bathroom"

-teacher: "thats the second time this hour pete.."

-pete: " Im sorry I drank alot of OJ juice today (actually bj juice) I have an overactive bladder" (well he has an overactive something thats for sure)

masturbaters by Whatever April 6, 2005

crunchy

Adjective. Used to describe persons who have adjusted or altered their lifestyle for environmental reasons. Crunchy persons tend to be politically strongly left-leaning and may be additionally but not exclusively categorized as vegetarians, vegans, eco-tarians, conservationists, environmentalists, neo-hippies, tree huggers, nature enthusiasts, etc.

Also used to describe establishments where alternative foods and products are sold, i.e. natural food stores.

Modified derivative of granola.

"I need more crunchy guys in my life. I'm so tired of dating preppy metrosexual assholes."

"I'm heading out to the crunchy store to pick up some fair trade chocolate and tea tree oil, do you need anything?"

crunchy by EBC July 11, 2007

Word of the Day on September 24, 2026

Galantir

A group of people, typically women, searching through someone’s digital footprint in order to find more information about that person.

Susie wasn’t sure if her new Hinge match was a creep, so she assembled Galantir and they found out he used to post slurs on gaming forums.

Galantir by Ge-sus September 22, 2026

Word of the Day on September 23, 2026

murderhobo

In a tabletop game, a murderhobo is a player who murders NPCs indiscriminately. This is normally derogatory, referring to a player who totally ignores quests, dialog, backstory, trade, world building etc.

The term is most common with Dungeons and Dragons, but it can be applied to most RPGs where the player is allowed to kill most quest-giving NPCs and NPC traders. E.g. Elder Scrolls, Fallout, Divinity original sin.

DM: The sad little orphan girl tugs at Steve's trenchcoat to get his attention, and ask for help saving her pet dog from...
Steve: I'd like to roll a strength check against strangling the orphan.
Dave: I call dibs on the dog.
DM: You murderhobos disgust me.

murderhobo by Loup&S September 9, 2021

Word of the Day on September 22, 2026

Whale

In sales terms, a whale is a prospect that is significantly larger than an organization’s average customer.

Whales are large and extremely difficult to close. Due to their immense size, they are highly sought-after.

A whale is typically identified at first by a whale hunter on the sales team, but often requires cross-discipline participation in order to close; this includes assistance from operations, engineering, creative, client success, and business development teams.

"Shit...the sales director chewed me out on the sales call this morning. He's totally pissed that I have nothing in my pipeline. I've been focused on this one whale for so long that I haven't had time to prospect for normal-sized deals."

Whale by FQ_GFY February 3, 2020

Word of the Day on September 21, 2026

Concrete cowboy

A guy who thinks he's a country kinda guy, but in reality lives a comfortable city / suburban life.

Eugene: Look at that dude in the cowboy hat!
Todd: He's just a concrete cowboy.

Concrete cowboy by EugeneJohnson42000 March 16, 2024

Word of the Day on September 20, 2026

hobo loko

any hard liquor that is cheap & potent.. eg. relska, popov, potters, evan williams, kamchatka, fireball, rumpleminze, southern comfort, everclear

hey let's get a drink of that?

go ahead
*takes drink* ugh wtf is that?

everclear & bepsi
fucking hobo loko eeessshh

hobo loko by d i z k o 2 0 8 September 14, 2026

Word of the Day on September 19, 2026