Becky sold me some Avon shaving cream that worked as a great masturbant.
Sue was watching Tom masturbate and offered some shaving cream to be used as a masturbant.
Sue was watching Tom masturbate and offered some shaving cream to be used as a masturbant.
by Tommy Bear May 5, 2004
by Elvo June 19, 2007
To jerk off, to jack off, to whack off, to beat off, to crank on out, to thrash, to choke the (Chinese) chicken, to pinch the one-eyed snake, to slap the salami, to spank the dolphin, to flog the dolphin, to pull the pork, to polish one's gun, to shine the silver, to beat the bishop, to smack little johnny behind his German helmet and purple bulbous ear, to do the five knuckle shuffle, to make love with oneself, to beat around the bush, to flick the sausage, to punch the purple ninja, to juice the snake, to peel the banana, to milk the cow, to squeeze the purple-headed yogurt-slinger, to slap the monkey, to tame the dragon, to play pocket pool, to go bowling by oneself, to hit a homerun in the homefield, and yet, to strike out, to whittle the woodblock, to shimmy up and down the pole of love, to initiate the Saturn V, to turn on the sprinklers, to turn on one's love hose, to punch the clown in the nose, to tweek the deek, to hit the dick, to tallywhack, to soil the Kleenex, to smother the hanky, and I'm sure I'm forgetting a few.
by Master Chesco April 19, 2004
Substitute pornography used by religious people, for instance the section of the Sunday newspaper advertising section that contains ads for bras and panties, or the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition.
by Gatorpress November 13, 2007
by Chuck Norris' son February 7, 2009
To please oneself while arousing sexual feelings, usually by rubbing, touching, and inserting one's fingers or other device in themselves in the case of a female. Usually accompanied by some sort of visual, audio, or mental help
Masturbation: Alex didn't feel like dry humping the bed post again, so he decided to masturbate to a home video of he and his ex making sweet love on the kitchen counter surrounded by empty vodka bottles and her lacy panties covering his eyes.
by Sexy Stripper Queen March 7, 2017
by anal fucker May 1, 2008