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Scremus Retardis Kerenis
A special type of the (Homo Sapiens Sapiens) also known as the modern human, this specimen has a limited vocabulary, only being capable of speaking words like "refund, manager, and free", while being able to parrot some other words. They are an extremely demanding specimen who are ill mannered, short tempered and are best kept at a safe distance, and anyone unfortunate enough to encounter them in the wild should make sure to keep a good distance from them if possible. Should you be unlucky enough to encounter one while possessing a job in the service industry, the best way to deal with them is to follow your training, remaining calm at all times and if the situation doesn’t sort itself, get backup from a manager.
*Karen at the clothes store*
Karen: I have a 50% off coupon for this, * hands over coupon*.
Cashier: I’m sorry Miss, but this coupon is only valid for Men’s wear at full price which would make this more expensive than this already is, since this is at a 60% clearance sale, in addition this coupon expired last week.
Karen: But I couldn’t make it last week so I called to ask if it could be extended and I got a yes to that.
Cashier: Well I’m sorry but we can’t give extensions without a managers approval.
*Karen gets frustrated and starts screaming at the cashier that she needs this at 110% off, and makes a big scene. A couple of customers behind her, an Aussie with his bird as well as his best friend stands in line watching the commotion unfold*
Aussie: Hey, that Karen looks a lot like a Scremus Retardis Kerenis right?
Best friend: Yeah, I didn’t think I’d be able to see one in the wild, it’s amazing how she can actually act like that, I would’ve died of embarrassment if my wife acted like that.
Karen: I have a 50% off coupon for this, * hands over coupon*.
Cashier: I’m sorry Miss, but this coupon is only valid for Men’s wear at full price which would make this more expensive than this already is, since this is at a 60% clearance sale, in addition this coupon expired last week.
Karen: But I couldn’t make it last week so I called to ask if it could be extended and I got a yes to that.
Cashier: Well I’m sorry but we can’t give extensions without a managers approval.
*Karen gets frustrated and starts screaming at the cashier that she needs this at 110% off, and makes a big scene. A couple of customers behind her, an Aussie with his bird as well as his best friend stands in line watching the commotion unfold*
Aussie: Hey, that Karen looks a lot like a Scremus Retardis Kerenis right?
Best friend: Yeah, I didn’t think I’d be able to see one in the wild, it’s amazing how she can actually act like that, I would’ve died of embarrassment if my wife acted like that.
Scremus Retardis Kerenis by Mikkebak July 24, 2021
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kherunissa by kutchi! January 30, 2020
Utility beer
Utility beer is the beer you keep around for the day-to-day moments when beer is a necessity to assist in pedestrian activities (golf, plumbing, yardwork, babysitting, staff meetings, Zoom calls). For the beer snob it is the beer you save for neighbors when they drop in at 3 p.m. on a Tuesday. It is differentiated from the actual high-end beer you save for special events, holidays, and special tastings.
Person 1: Dave, did you bring along those hazy craft IPA's so we could drink while cleaning Lyle's pool?
Person 2: Nope. I just have a bunch of utility beer that Steve dumped on me. Good enough for this. It is only 10:30 a.m.
Person 2: Nope. I just have a bunch of utility beer that Steve dumped on me. Good enough for this. It is only 10:30 a.m.
Utility beer by lakeshore February 1, 2022
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Oinking
Police activity, especially of the non-productive type i.e. The act of setting up and patrolling speed traps, harassing or arresting people based on appearance (racial profiling), breaking up parties, any sort of cannabis bust, etc.
"Did you see all the cops on highway 6? They are oinking hard!"
"I hope Johnny doesn't get caught with his bag of weed, the pigs are oinking"
"I hope Johnny doesn't get caught with his bag of weed, the pigs are oinking"
Oinking by DontDrinkSoda June 29, 2013
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A video or picture depicting an unrealistic scenario that is often seen as hopeful but in reality, is unrealistic or otherwise rare in real life.
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