Just an absolute stud, everybody wants him. Hes a fucking champ, and everyone loves him. And he's so badass and sad and lonely that he has to make things up about himself on Urban Dictionary.
Justonian pretending to be someone else hoping for some reassurance: "Justonian is prettyawesome, huh?"
Someone else: "I've never heard of him, but he sounds like a faggot."
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.