Jerkmate Ranked

Popular online form of entertainment and contests between like-minded people of all ages, who all share a passion for ejaculation, whilst all achieving certain standards of gooning and jelqing. This contest is judged upon the speed, intensity and flair of stroking one's Corpus spongiosum (penis). The competition is carried out in formats of single, doubles and squad.

Billy have you done your work yet?

'Fuck off I'm gooning on Jerkmate Ranked'

Jerkmate Ranked by Fondle Monster 69 February 3, 2025

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ranked jerkmate

The art of stroking it with precision and techniques unique to oneself in elite competition.

Aye bro hop on Ranked Jerkmate with me.

ranked jerkmate by GorillaMonkeyBalls February 3, 2025

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Hate Sink

A person you hate intensely not because they deserve such hatred but because they serve as a focus for your general hatred. A healthy way to dispense with excess animosity.

Jake's not really that big an asshole. He just serves as my hate sink.

Hate Sink by The great prophet Zarquon August 7, 2016

Word of the Day on July 26, 2026

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funiosity

The art of being peculiar, but in an amusing fashion.

"Wow, look at that dog running on three legs"
- "Yeah, that sure is a funiosity"

funiosity by Supersonic Stevie November 23, 2007

Word of the Day on July 25, 2026

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Toe Rag

A toe rag was originally a foot wrapping used, since mediaeval times up until the mid-nineteenth century, to protect the foot from chafing by boots or shoes. As these were, quite literally, rags they weren’t usually washed, and so with use they became very smelly until they were thrown away. Because of the similarity in smell, toe rag also became the name applied to dried, salted cod or other things with a strong, unpleasant, fishy smell. It didn’t take that long before the name was applied to someone who was an obnoxious, unpleasant OIC.

1 “Socks! Those aren’t socks you smelly git, they’re toe rags!”
2 “What have you been cooking? Smells like toe rag!”
3 “I can smell ‘er fanny from ‘ere, proper toe rag.”
4 That Heale Malcolm is a right toe rag.

Toe Rag by AKACroatalin November 29, 2016

Word of the Day on July 24, 2026

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Eternity leave

When some resigns or retires from a job, they are on "eternity leave". This can also refer to someone who has passed away, especially someone who worked somewhere for a long time, retired/resigned, then passed away later.

Oh I'm sorry, you didn't know that Kelly is on eternity leave? She resigned and moved to Hawaii!

With regrets I would like to inform you that my boss is officially on eternity leave. I will never see or hear them again. Ever.

Eternity leave by LingDanc803 February 7, 2023

Word of the Day on July 23, 2026

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jody

The hypothetical man (often a sinister character who decided not to go to boot camp) that is doing your girlfriend/wife while you are on deployment overseas.

Ain't no use in goin home,
Jody's got your girl and gone.
Ain't no use in goin back,
Jody's got your Cadillac,
Ain't no use in feeling blue,
Jody's took your checkbook too.

jody by Sgt Apan March 31, 2006

Word of the Day on July 22, 2026

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