The combination of horticulture and irrigation techniques to increase the productivity of plants. The amalgamation of the science and technology of plant cultivation and artificial water application.
Our plants are flourishing due to the hortigation solution we found.
A limited-run, seasonal relationship entered exclusively for the holiday stretch. Two emotionally unavailable people agree to be each other’s festive plus-one so they can avoid looking like a lonely houseplant while everyone else couples up. Activities may include: aggressively holding hands at Christmas markets, kissing under mistletoe like you’re starring in a discount rom-com, and securing a guaranteed New Year’s kiss without emotional debt.
Both parties are fully aware that this expires once the holiday lights come down. No expectations, no false hope, no “what are we?” talks. It’s not a hookup that leaves you feeling empty, not a situationship where someone inevitably catches feelings, and definitely not Friends With Benefits. It’s a temporary subscription to companionship for the sake of fun, warmth, and cute memories. After New Year’s, you “promise to stay in touch,” and then never do.
“Don’t worry, I’m not catching feelings. He’s just my holidationship. Expiration date: January 2nd, right after the hangover.”
Cigarette: Northern slang for a cigarette, used oft by mashed up mancunian ravers becasue of the resemblance of a hot(electric)stove to the end of a lit cigarette. Originated circa 1991 in the early halcyon days of the rave culture; we speculate during a drug fuelled hallucination by said manc.
'fuck me noel, i am bolloxed, is that a ciggy in your mouth, or the stove from me 'nans kitchen'/
General use: 'Give us a stove you cunt'