A handjob in which someone is jerked off through a velvet crown royal bag, a bag commonly used as a dice bag by dungeons and dragons players. The sex act its self is referencing an item from dnd called a handy haversack (basically a lesser bag of holding)
Frank: How was dnd last night?
Bill: Dude! Jenna gave me a Handy Haversack after the game was over!
Cigarette: Northern slang for a cigarette, used oft by mashed up mancunian ravers becasue of the resemblance of a hot(electric)stove to the end of a lit cigarette. Originated circa 1991 in the early halcyon days of the rave culture; we speculate during a drug fuelled hallucination by said manc.
'fuck me noel, i am bolloxed, is that a ciggy in your mouth, or the stove from me 'nans kitchen'/
General use: 'Give us a stove you cunt'
A hardo is a person who tries extremely hard at everything. Most times a hardo will try very hard at things that do not require excessive effort. For example, sports practices, gym class, etc.
Wow did you see Jack at practice today? What a hardo!