ECOLOGIC BURRITO
ECOLOGIC BURRITO by JE2388 March 9, 2009
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Café Ecologist
Generally, a government employee or environmental consultant who has no practical field skills or an understanding of ecology.
Unable to navigate in the bush without the aid of a touch screen device. Turn up into the field dressed in completely new clothes, almost always in khaki and predominately featuring an outdoors store latest season catalogue. Various digital accoutrements hang off their belt to help with managing the wilderness. Prone to printing off a small woodlands worth of paperwork with every page colour coded, labelled and compartmentalised in corresponding coloured manilla folders. Cannot change a tyre.
Spend the majority of their time in the office obsessing of minor inconsequential details which will be overlooked by the client. Readily plot survey points on a map with scant regard for topography, vegetation density or difficulty of access for which they will then send out contractors to complete the actual work. Dislike meetings but will tolerate them for the tiny catered sandwiches during mid-morning tea. Drink soy lattes.
Have the fitness of a wounded gazelle. Consider light wind a significant hazard and will accordingly cancel the days work. Accustomed to hefty meal allowances of which most will be spent on sourdough and chia seeds. Don’t like spiders or things getting in their hair. Find fieldwork emotionally and physically traumatising despite their Instagram hashtags indicating otherwise.
Readily identify as an ‘ecologist’ in their email signature.
Unable to navigate in the bush without the aid of a touch screen device. Turn up into the field dressed in completely new clothes, almost always in khaki and predominately featuring an outdoors store latest season catalogue. Various digital accoutrements hang off their belt to help with managing the wilderness. Prone to printing off a small woodlands worth of paperwork with every page colour coded, labelled and compartmentalised in corresponding coloured manilla folders. Cannot change a tyre.
Spend the majority of their time in the office obsessing of minor inconsequential details which will be overlooked by the client. Readily plot survey points on a map with scant regard for topography, vegetation density or difficulty of access for which they will then send out contractors to complete the actual work. Dislike meetings but will tolerate them for the tiny catered sandwiches during mid-morning tea. Drink soy lattes.
Have the fitness of a wounded gazelle. Consider light wind a significant hazard and will accordingly cancel the days work. Accustomed to hefty meal allowances of which most will be spent on sourdough and chia seeds. Don’t like spiders or things getting in their hair. Find fieldwork emotionally and physically traumatising despite their Instagram hashtags indicating otherwise.
Readily identify as an ‘ecologist’ in their email signature.
Standing at the precipice of a volcano looking down into a cauldron of boiling, angry lava.
Ecologist 1: Who put the site down there?
Ecologist 2: A fucking café ecologist.
Ecologist 1: Who put the site down there?
Ecologist 2: A fucking café ecologist.
Café Ecologist by The Angry Biologist October 16, 2019
ecologist
"You don't look like one of those pasty scientists that spends all day in the lab and never has any fun."
"That's because I'm an ECOLOGIST."
"That's because I'm an ECOLOGIST."
ecologist by streamlover October 3, 2013
egological
He is so egological, blowing off a trip to the beach with his best friends to hook up with a random girl.
egological by Crawsomi September 26, 2009
Ecologicality
J: What is that filthy hippie doing living in your backyard? His tent is ridiculous and all his dumpster diving exploits are alienating you from your neighbors!
M: He's striving for ecologicality.
M: He's striving for ecologicality.
Ecologicality by McFunkindunkle December 29, 2010
emological
Emotionally logical, i.e. having a sense of coherence and reasonableness in one's emotions, expressions of emotion, or emotional processes.
I am trying my best to deal with my boyfriend's temper tantrums in an emological manner, but he nearly drives me up the wall.
emological by theking0fhearts October 13, 2006