drameter 

A combination of drama and meter. A measure of how much drama is occurring during a situation.

Dude, the drameter was registering a 9.5 out of 10 when Joe confronted Suzie in front of all of us at the dinner table about her cheating on him. You totally should have been there

drameter by DL625 April 13, 2009

diameter 

a person's middle, torso etc.

Dude: Twinkies = best thing ever bro
Bro: You know your diameter's increasing cuz of that shit, right dude? You'll die

diameter by Dippson October 9, 2008