An extremely small unit to measure things by, subdivided into a `gnat's dick-end´, (about 8 to the gnat's dick), and a `gnat's cock-hair´, (about 12 to the gnat's dick-end) thus giving an imperial scale of 96 divisions. This sort of accuracy is essential if you're trying to get people on the moon, and maybe one day we will!
Hebden Bridge council worker to oppo,who's struggling to put up a lamp post:
'Move bugger a gnat's dick toward canal'
Oppo gives a shove the wrong way.
'Aye lad, another gnat's cock-hair and yer reet.'
Obnoxious gnats that swarm around a male dog's dick during the warmer months. Entomologists theorize they are attracted to the salt contained in the piss crystals matted in the dog's dick fur.
You reckon the reason dogs lick their dicks is to get the dick gnats off their peter??
Cigarette: Northern slang for a cigarette, used oft by mashed up mancunian ravers becasue of the resemblance of a hot(electric)stove to the end of a lit cigarette. Originated circa 1991 in the early halcyon days of the rave culture; we speculate during a drug fuelled hallucination by said manc.
'fuck me noel, i am bolloxed, is that a ciggy in your mouth, or the stove from me 'nans kitchen'/
General use: 'Give us a stove you cunt'