Claus

The closest a person can get to God. A Claus is usually someone with a large penis, very attractive, etc. He is the best in everything, and nothing or no one can compare to him.

Man, I wish I was a Claus.

by Dr. Who's Seuss November 8, 2010

Flag

Get the Claus mug.

claus

Where do I even start on this one.... Claus is DA FLIPPING MAN OF GOD. He is also the most random person that exists nowadays. Here is how it all began: Claus decided to leave his non-random followers, and here is how it went:

Follower #1: Where is Claus?

Follower #2: He is flying into outer space.

Follower #1: WHAT? He bought a rocket?

Follower #2: No, he's been building one.
(I love you if you get the reference)

And that is how how Claus took his two wives, his children and his goat Clausishia and flew away. After countless nights he reached a very random looking planet in the Milky Way. The Clasanian family landed there and realised that it was a very random country with very random people living there. Since Claus is basically a millionaire, he built somewhere around 400000 bridges there so that everyone would have a place to stay. He sold his rocket and bought a bunch of cardboard boxes for his family. That very same day, the Clausanian family got robbed and were left with nothing. And that is how they ended up living under the Clausanian bridges. However, the people found Claus attractive, and made him their CEO. Claus named the planet after him, and it became the Random Land Of Clausania. And that is how Claus became CLAUS-THE-RANDOM-MAN-OF-GOD.

Clauser #1: Do you believe in the power of Claus?
Clauser #2: Of course, I mean he is the absolute man of God!

by Random Claus May 28, 2020

Flag